Not Another D&D Podcast - C3 Ep. 56: Diviner (The Ice Knife Saga)

Episode Date: March 22, 2024

Duck Team races after Gowan to find the Ice Knife! Calder takes charge, Callie has a revelation, and Sol reconnects with an old friend. Support us at Patreon.com/Naddpod to get acce...ss to the after-show and a bunch of other Naddpod content! Get tickets to our upcoming live shows at naddpod.com/live.Music / Sound Effects Include: “A Wizard’s Tournament” by Emily Axford."Secret Basement" by Emily Axford."Soul Coins" by Emily Axford."Winter's Mantle" by Emily Axford."Corrupted" by Emily Axford."Tundra Trudge" by Emily Axford."Escape From Smuggler's Bounty" by Emily Axford."Mee Maw's Burden" by Emily Axford."A Friend for Life" by Emily Axford. "Winter Sprite" by Emily Axford. "Unknown Tome" by Emily Axford. "A Memory" by Emily Axford. "Broken Heart Banshee" by Emily Axford."Writing on the Wall" by Emily Axford. "The Pact" by Emily Axford. "Ghost Dragon" by Emily Axford. "Angels & Devils" by Emily Axford. "Sea Beast" by Emily Axford. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 This is a HeadGum Podcast. Welcome to the Campaign After the Campaign. This is Not Another D&D Podcast. Welcome back to Bohumia, everybody! Bohumia! I'm your dungeon master Brian Murphy joined by Jake Hurwitz. Feeling low, miss my bro, where did he go? Alongside, Saul Buffau, call the kid in.
Starting point is 00:00:32 There it is! Saul Buffau's a great one to rhyme with, you know? If you just need a bunch of O sounds, Saul's your boy. Feels good. And then of course we've got Emily Axford. From Ingrid's store to Icy Shores to camping indoors, it's Calliope Fectricore. Whoa!
Starting point is 00:00:49 Oh, Calliope just had a nice night. I don't remember anything else. Yeah, just a fun little camping trip indoors. Really pleasant. I guess just did witness an assassination attempt, but. I don't remember. Only an attempt, no. An attempt?
Starting point is 00:01:01 Only an attempt. It was just an attempt. And then of course we have Caldwell Tanner. Oh, Saul Buffau, hey, did you know? No. No, you didn't know or know something. You can't stop me. I have to do it.
Starting point is 00:01:15 I have to do an intro. A species of RAL's intermediate golden-backed frogs was discovered with a mushroom growing off of its flank. That is right. There is real life scientific precedent for mushroom frogs. Take that frog haters! Okay, Jake, use the frog instrument correctly, by the way. Really?
Starting point is 00:01:33 Yeah, because apparently you're supposed to do it down up. That's how you make the frog sound. Oh. Sorry, I don't have the musical touch that Jake has. I will say I do like the collective gaslighting that the audience did of me where everyone was like, we knew it was the frog Murph. You didn't have to describe that. Yeah. There was lots of Patreon comments that were just like, we knew exactly what it was. Wow. We knew exactly. It wasn't a visual bit. Yeah. It was not a visual bit. Wow. You said that the audience agrees that he was playing it wrong. Right. But also says they knew what
Starting point is 00:02:04 it was. Interesting. It was a tiny W for me, for sure. It was definitely a tiny W for Caldwell, a tiny L for me, and honestly an L for anyone that wants things described to them in the future. A huge L for anyone that wants the show to start. Yeah. Alright, let's go ahead and do a little recap.
Starting point is 00:02:23 Oh, thanks to Zech, P, and Chris for sharing that article, by the way. No. Oh, right on. Hey. Not about the wood frog, but about the mushroom frog. Yeah, about the mushroom frog. Right on. The moonshine was there. The moonshine was there.
Starting point is 00:02:35 She slapped that frog. Or maybe it was wild-shaped moonshine. Wow, holy shit. Theory. All right, let's do a little recap. So last time, you discussed the strange pod you found in the lake with Gregor. You went back to Calder's meat shed where Gregor tried to... It just sounds like a masturbation euphemism.
Starting point is 00:02:55 And it's also not really his meat shed, it's his family's meat shed. It's his dad's meat shed. It's his dad's meat shed. You went back to his dad's meat shed where Gregor tried to... So much worse. Gregor tried to theorize about Alexandrite's invasion, bringing up that some of the attacks have been inconsistent. You were hesitant to bring him in the loop because of fears that he had been compromised, so he left before long. Afterwards, Saul called Ursiah and told her to get in contact with Albin. Kali also shared in the info she learned from the Sunflower that there were giant kin frozen under the mountain that could be amenable to any alliance
Starting point is 00:03:29 that involved breaking the Fey crowns. As you made plans to track down Gowan, you suddenly heard a boom coming from the town square and ran off to investigate. There you found the Alchemist's house in flames and a group of scared onlookers who saw Gregor go in. Calder found Gregor in the burning basement, looking for Ingrid, when all he could find was her apron. You rushed out of the house. As the roof collapsed, all that was left was a back wall with the message, NOW, written in blood. Gawon showed up a moment later and confronted Gregor, believing him compromised. Before the two brothers could clash, a giant stepped out of the crowd to break them up.
Starting point is 00:04:09 Calder recognized this as the missing Boris Frigg, who suddenly moved with unnatural movement, now an android, who attacked Gregor with vicious aggression. Sol acted with incredible reflexes, pummeling the android, and with a big time hit from Callieali they were able to save Gregor. After the android exploded the brothers embraced and you all went to speak in Gawon's room above the North Star. Eventually Kali and Saul went back to Calder's house to check on his parents but Gawon and
Starting point is 00:04:38 Calder stayed to watch over Gregor. During the night Gawon seemed paranoid and constantly checked the window. When Calder asked what he was looking for he told him to stay away from the frog. The brothers all went to sleep, but when Calder awoke the next morning, Gawain was gone, leaving only a note that said, Sorry, little brother. Calder rushed to his family's house with Gregor and gathered up the rest of you. After speaking to Meera about the curse of the Iceknife, you headed out in pursuit of Gawain. And that's where we are now.
Starting point is 00:05:12 But as you exit the Killday cabin and the open air hits you, you suddenly hear interference coming from your shell phone. Oh, I hand it to Sol. I'm blowing up. I pull out the fake one first. Solphone. Oh, I hand it to Sol. I'm blowing up. I pull out the fake one first. Sol phone. Oh, it's the other one actually. You hear from the actual shell phone
Starting point is 00:05:33 a message that's coming in kind of spotty at first you hear Hello, Sol? Sol? Albie! Albie, is that you? Frog Pals! Albie! Oh, I'm through, I'm through. Good to hear from you, Saul. So good to hear from you. Are you okay? Yes, yes, I'm... well, uh, yes, I'm fine. Uh, currently, uh, do you... I mean, you know things are bad.
Starting point is 00:05:53 We all know things are bad. Oh, sure, yeah, like, just background, like... Oh, just everything. Low-level interference of bad. Just low-level interference of bad in the background. But me right now? I'm fine. That's what I want to hear.
Starting point is 00:06:03 Yes. Um, okay, so, I've been trying to trace you, background but me right now I'm fine. That's what I want to hear. Yes okay so I've been trying to trace you but it's much easier now that you've got an item like this your friend Urcia reach out to me. Yeah she's great yeah. She's great so polite took a really long time to get to it so I will not make the same mistake listen yeah the Alexandrite hub the old mothership submersible, it's evolving and we're having a hard time tracking it, but we did see a blip heading below the continent. We're worried she's planning something big.
Starting point is 00:06:35 We are not far from you. We're in Frostwind right now. We're trying to mobilize a force here. Okay, you're in Frostwind? Yes. Incredible. Yes, it's not too far. Things are, you know, when I said I was fine, I was actually doing, um, I was projecting to a big group of people, like some Frostwind nobles, trying to ask for their help. One of them insulted me and I thought my, I thought my projector was off and I called him a dick. So things have gone back a few steps. Ma Goblin's not talking to me at the moment. Things are messy over here, Sol.
Starting point is 00:07:09 I side with Ma. Do Kelly just say she sided with Ma? No, she said that she sided with me because I side with you. Oh, excellent. Long walk to get there, but a nice sentiment nonetheless. Calder, silent as always, I assume. I like the goblin, yeah. Yeah, I thought as much.
Starting point is 00:07:30 I thought I heard that. Right, well, we'll be here working on that. We shouldn't be too far away from you. I see where you are. I see that you're near the ice knife. Yeah, God, it's been a while since we've been so close. I'm glad to know you're holding steady at the very least. Yes I'm hoping things will come together and and we'll hopefully be able to put a stop to all of this before anything truly bad happens
Starting point is 00:07:54 Okay, and um one other thing. Yeah, you had mentioned in our last talk that you were a clone. Yeah. Yeah that came up? Yes, so I, in the midst of all this other stuff, I did spend some time, I was able to access some of Patina Glenbottles old files and I found some information on the clone program. Dude, you've really leveled up, man. You're killing it over there. Oh, well, tell that to everybody over here. You hear that, Ma? Yes, I agree. I'll stop talking to anyone. Put her on. Put her on. I'll tell her.
Starting point is 00:08:33 You should have been there. I wish I could have been there. Sounds like you put both feet in the house. Very bad public speaker. My fists are very loud. I can clap very loudly. I would have covered up all the boos. Very good, the mage. Very bad public speaker. My fists are very loud, I can clap very loudly, I would have covered up all the boos. Very good mage, very bad public speaker. You see, she gets away from the shell phone and goes, Yes, anyway, the clone program, it was a sort of beta program for the Synth Eldritch Knights.
Starting point is 00:08:56 It was at a time that they wanted to build soldiers instead of just enchanting them. But the original Saul escaped before they could make a full batch of clones. Apparently they fast-tracked a few and grew them at an accelerated rate. Those were sent after the original Saul as assassins, but they were killed by their intended target. They're marked as dead. There was only... There was only one full clone, Saul. Just the one tadpole, and it's been marked as released when the program was canceled. Oh. Well that... I mean... Just you, Saul. Just... just me. Okay. But we just heard that there might be... I'm sorry, I'm just a little confused because we just heard a rumor that there was another frog seen at Coldbreak.
Starting point is 00:09:57 Coldbreak. I can look into it. Frostwind has been trying to reach them and hasn't gotten any word back. We did hear that there was an attack there. I'm sure there could be other Bullywugs. According to this information, and look, it might be faulty, they might not have all of the information, according to this, you're the only true clone of the original Saul Buffau. You know, that's actually oddly nice to know. I was worried for a while about all this potential family and all these connections out here, but now I know who I have and I know who I need to protect and that's really good to know. Well, I didn't need any of this info,
Starting point is 00:10:40 Saul. I always knew you were special frog pal. Likewise boy, wizard. Perfect. Can you imagine the two of them public speaking together? The two of them taking on a different matter. Another excellent public speech by the boy wizard and his frog. It makes me wonder if some of their dialogue got punch ups in their original books. I can imagine going to this two-man show. Can you send me a picture of the goatee? I want to see how it's coming in. Right on. Wispy as always, good buddy. Whoa.
Starting point is 00:11:12 Alright, see you... ...soon. Alright. Nailed it. Hear him trying to hang up and it takes way too long. Ma Goblin parading him. Over and also out. See you. Bye. I love you.
Starting point is 00:11:30 What? And the connection ends. Okay. Honestly, that's kind of nice to know. I could go into this with a semi-clear conscience. Yeah, you won't be looking for frogs everywhere you go. Yeah. You know, you don't, that's like a burden off your back Yeah, I kind of have been seeing phantom frogs. Yeah edge of my vision. So now now I can go into this clear-headed
Starting point is 00:11:53 Yeah, you're the only frog pal I need Yeah, well and swag so too right but it's still not a lot. No, I consider we thought there was a lot relatively. Yeah Sweet so you guys begin making your way to the chamber of the ice knife beyond the frozen waterfall. You guys walk out across the frozen lake. And as you go further north, the lakeside houses begin to disappear as the landscape gets more and more inhospitable.
Starting point is 00:12:20 As we're walking across the lake, I mean, I'm just going to look for any kind of like huge shadow of a presence underneath us. It does not, I'll say you don't even need to do a perception check here. You know from the fact that she sent like a pod ahead with like a little drill that it does not, and you, you already swam at the base of the lake here, you know that for something of that size to get through this, it would take longer and it would be an explosion,
Starting point is 00:12:53 it would be an earthquake, it would be like a huge natural disaster, there would be no way to stealthily do it. But you do see that there are rangers around and stuff, because Gawain, the last thing he had said was to watch the lake and to shoot up flares if anything comes out of it. So you do see a bunch of rangers walking around.
Starting point is 00:13:14 And in fact, a couple of them clock you, Calder, and walk up to you and go, Calder, have you seen your- I salute them. He salutes you as well. Have you seen your brother, the ranger Ranger General hasn't been around this morning. Uh, not today. He got up early. I think he went on a scouting mission. But keep your lines tight, send up those flares, and expect the unexpected.
Starting point is 00:13:38 Yeah. And if you see Gowan, hang on to him so I can meet him before he debriefs with anybody else. Oh, and actually, if you have some extra flares, it might be helpful so we can send him up as well. Yeah, you see, goes in and pulls out like a canister. That's essentially a cantrip that'll do, you know, like a firework in the sky. Hell yeah. Not gonna do like 10d10 of damage or anything like that. Hey man, you never know. No, no, I do. I do.
Starting point is 00:14:09 Agree to disagree, you know. Yeah, he gives you this flare, and looks like, you guys watch as Calder kind of takes on this authority, and this ranger is kind of like comforted, like they lost their leader this morning, can't find him, everything's gone to shit, but just hearing somebody talk to him and be like, this is what you do, it's all good, let me know when he comes back. It's like, cool, I've got a job to do, great. Goes back to looking around the lake. Lead the way, Ranger Kilday. Oh, called her, squares his shoulders, and trips a little bit, but then walks really straight and with purpose.
Starting point is 00:14:43 Eventually, you guys reach the end of the lake where the water meets the mountain and find this enormous frozen waterfall with huge icicle chunks that look like hanging stalactites. You can hear a trickle of some running water beyond the frozen exterior, and you hear a howl of wind from the crystal caverns beyond, but you see it is just darkness there. But you do have this map. The map looks like it takes you through these winding crystal caverns to the chamber of the ice knife.
Starting point is 00:15:15 And once you're there, you're kind of in the domain of this haunted entity, whatever it is. So the map just kind of gets you to the dungeon you need to get to essentially. Yeah. All right, follow the map. So the map just kind of gets you to the dungeon you need to get to essentially. Yeah. All right. Follow the map. Follow the map.
Starting point is 00:15:29 Right. Sweet. You guys enter the crystal caves and it is pitch black. You see, Kenna takes a moment, lights a torch, and you see the light reflecting back on you guys on all sides, thick ice coats the inside of this cave to the extent that you're basically in a giant maze of mirrors. You look down at the map to the relic's chamber and it's a confusing mess of tunnels.
Starting point is 00:15:53 I'm gonna need a navigation check. This is going to be a DC 25 because you're not exposed to the elements, but you can't use history. You have to do nature or survival. Same deal as before, you can get lost or get exhausted, but since it's a tunnel, there are ways to account for getting lost. You see, Kenna will take the back of her hammer and kind of mark up the wall
Starting point is 00:16:16 with like the claw of the hammer to make like a lines to know where you guys have been. I can do, um, some flapjack crumbs too. Right. I used to get lost all the time at Launchpad, so I'm pretty good at finding my way around. All right, great. I can maybe do a survival check. Right on. Yeah, Kenna will hit you with a Squire Inspiration for a D4, and we'll also add a help to that
Starting point is 00:16:35 so you get advantage. I think back to the time that Albin and I were chased around by a giant sentient vacuum. That must have sucked. Oh, you've read the book. You guys really depended on that specific joke. The book was very thin on plot. I will also look at Sol and be like, you're one of a kind. Or rather two.
Starting point is 00:17:03 But that's cool too, right? We've been hanging out with twins and it honestly looks more fun than being two of a kind. Yeah, you can sometimes win in poker with that. OK, I'm going to roll with advantage here. Great. Yep. Saul looks at the map, tries to make sense of this kind of confusing mess. OK, so the best I can do is a 14, but I'm going to roll my bardic. Oh, no. Oh, that but I'm going to roll my bardic. Oh no. Oh, that's not even gonna get you.
Starting point is 00:17:27 That's a 16 with the bardic, with the D4, that's an 18, Jesus Christ. Okay. Fuck yeah, that's all I got. Let's get lost. You guys go for quite a bit, and through this confusing path of tunnels, and you guys finally get to an area
Starting point is 00:17:45 where the path diverges and you check the map and you just cannot find any spot on here that matches up with it. I feel bad I've been eating the flapjack crumbs. I didn't really get to eat before we left. Yeah and in the book there was like a real deus ex machina moment where like our friend just saved us from the vacuum cleaner and like we didn't even actually have to find our way out of it so It was cheap. It was cheap. It was unearned. Again, I like the characters, but some of the plots are really... It was weird. It was Albin from the future and that just never came up again. All right, well I put the claw on here and we can try to make it back as far as we can until we
Starting point is 00:18:24 recognize an area on the map. Okay, let's try to make it back as far as we can until we recognize an area on the map. Okay, let's try to retrace our steps. Yeah, yeah. Okay, go ahead and give me... Everybody give me Constitution saving throws to see if you're gonna get exhausted from all of this hiking. Oh! 19! Okay, Callie, you pass. You're all dead. It's gonna be a big 10 for Saul for Saul Saul you get a level of exhaustion
Starting point is 00:18:46 He's fuck that means disadvantage on a bill. Oh wait. It's a saving It's a saving throw Kenna is gonna hit you with the reinforce and let you reroll a saving oh, thank God Yeah, you with the best survival having disadvantage on your checks would be very bad mm-hmm That's an F20. Nice. Yes. It's only a 15 for me, but I'm gonna use Indomitable and reroll a saving throw. That's a 19.
Starting point is 00:19:14 Okay, you're all good. DC was 16, you are safe. Can it just slaps all of us? Yeah. All right, everybody give it together. We're doing it. It slaps all the hardest. You guys kind of retrace your steps
Starting point is 00:19:26 and get back to a place on the map where you think you recognize it. Go ahead and give me another survival or nature check. Okay. Okay, I look at Sol and I say, because you're two of a kind and you're the second one. Second time's a charm. There we go.
Starting point is 00:19:39 And it's another bardic. Two winks, that's just closing your eyes. All right. Squire inspiration. I'm closing my eyes because I'm fucking scared. What's gonna happen? Yeah. Squire Inspiration and a Help Action. Okay. I'm gonna roll with Advantage.
Starting point is 00:19:51 Ah, hell yeah, that's a 15 plus 8, 23. Okay. Oh, good. Alright, so even if you roll a 1 on both, but maybe you can save the Bardic Inspiration. Yeah, roll the Squire. So try the Squire one first. Good call. Alright, that's a 1 on the Bardic. That's a 1 on the Bardic. You do have to exhaust all your stuff.
Starting point is 00:20:07 Okay, that's a one on the square dice. I'm gonna roll the bardic as well. Yeah, so as long as you get a one, you're fine. Callie, open your eyes. That's a two. Great, okay, you barely do it, but you make it. All right. So you guys have a pretty exhausting day of hiking.
Starting point is 00:20:21 You think this probably took you five or six hours to get through all of this. Oh, let's hope that Gowan was as ill prepared for this as us. We ran out of flapjacks and had to use syrup. There's ants everywhere. I called it. I don't know if Mr. Perfect is going to make us. I was going to say Mr.
Starting point is 00:20:39 Kilday, do you think that Gowan would have been prepared? Uh, yeah, I think he's meticulously prepared. Do we see any of his footprints or tracks? Go ahead and make an investigation check or a perception check. Can I help? Yeah. Can I help Cawler?
Starting point is 00:20:55 Yeah. 25. You do see some giant footprints in the snow here, or not snow, like frost. Yeah. Oh, all right. So- That's my brother's food.
Starting point is 00:21:09 Those were his red wings, shit. I'll say they're not frequent enough. It's kind of like, there's a little bit of frost here. It's not snow, so there's not like perfect footprints. You couldn't have followed his footsteps through here, but now that you know you're on the right path, you can look for signs that someone was here. And you do see certain parts where like bits of the wall are like leaking some condensation.
Starting point is 00:21:30 Looks like he might've brought a torch through there. Every once in a while, you'll see like a collection of frost and you see like a boot print in there. All signs point to Gowan having come this way. Right. Can you analyze his stride to see how confident he is? Yeah, Gowan's been going. Shit. Yeah, he's going, but he is...
Starting point is 00:21:47 I'll say with a 25, he's not confident. He's rattled. Yeah, I was going to say he's clearly turned around if we're seeing his footprints here. Wow. Yeah. Yeah, he does not look like he made a perfect run to the chamber. I've never seen his confidence shaking before. Yeah. So you guys make
Starting point is 00:22:08 your way through the tunnels, crisscrossing different paths, left right up down into the darkness, the trail is even more confusing because of the reflections of the walls. It's making you kind of second guess where you are if you're going the right way. It looks like there's a tunnel one way, but nope, that's just a reflection of a hallway going in the opposite direction. But you hunker down and move slowly following the map. And eventually you guys get to what appears to be the location of the chamber on the map. But all you see is a dead end, a wall of ice. This one covered in deep white frost. Hmm. This is what it says on the back.
Starting point is 00:22:45 Maybe we have to break through. Or maybe it's an illusion. Saul walks confidently into the wall. You see, Saul hits his head on the wall. Ow. But since he's walking, it barely does any damage just to his pride. The physics seem odd, they like bounce off of it
Starting point is 00:23:03 and then walk into it again. There's just a loud thud that echoes. And it's just a real wet frog sound, The physics seem off, I like bounce off of it and then walk into it again. There's just a loud thud that echoes and it's just a real wet frog sound. Just... No, it's real. Great, well we should go back. It's a good try. Maybe let's try and use our hands to chip away the frost.
Starting point is 00:23:24 Yeah. I'll take out a bit of wood and light a torch with my prestidigitation. Oh, sweet. Yeah. Try and like melt it. This is very Breath of the Wild. Yeah. You hold a torch over the wall and you do see that the snow begins to melt away and
Starting point is 00:23:41 you begin to see carvings in the ice. On the left side of the wall you see lids, lashes and a pupil, a symbol of a giant eye. And on the right side of the wall you see a carving of a snowflake and Kali as that one appears your sword begins to glow, the hilt where you put the snowflake emblem. Is that... So, is that... that's Ariax's symbol. Yeah, that's Ariax's symbol. And that... These two different paths. Yeah, it looks like it. You see two doors. Two doors.
Starting point is 00:24:17 And the eye, that's the symbol of... Grumps. It's the symbol of... well, the symbol of Grumps, technically, is... Missing the bloody... Is missing the symbol of groups technically is missing the bloody. Is missing the knife through the eye, yeah. I had to memorize a bunch of banners and stuff for Squire class. Wow. Squire eye.
Starting point is 00:24:32 Squire eye, yeah. It's good for trivia nights, it's good for... It's excellent for trivia nights. Well, I don't know what a trivia night is, I'm a kid. You don't know what a trivia night is? Kids can have trivia nights. Alright, I get the idea. But...
Starting point is 00:24:42 Kenna, when this is over, I'm taking you to a trivia night. tree. You know what you cannot we're gonna have a lock-in at the church Can it looks worried? Let's not commit to anything yet So I bet to get through the eye you just stop it But maybe we could also go the Auriok's path. Yeah with my sword I I think I I trust I trust you to walk the path of Aurioks more than Grumsh Is there a reason that the Grumsh path would be better? I from what we know about Grumsh and his followers. I would say no. Okay. Okay. I mean that was my thought
Starting point is 00:25:21 Oh, can I can I investigate and see if we can tell which way Gowon went? Yeah. So weirdly enough, the left door, the one with the eye on it, the incompleted symbol of Grimsh, the door looks completely locked in. Like it doesn't even have, it doesn't have any kind of knob or any way to open it.
Starting point is 00:25:43 You go over, you touch it, there's no push to it. it there's no give to it but there are boots in front of it and it looks like he went in that one the one with the snowflake is like cracked open a little bit inviting to inviting i feel like we should follow gowen yeah i don't want him going off on his own i i i'm biased i want to follow my brother but i don't want to i i don't know him going off on his own. I am biased. I wanna follow my brother, but I don't wanna, I don't know if I'm thinking clearly. Are you, what are you? I'm thinking clearly. And I think that it doesn't help us to, you know,
Starting point is 00:26:13 go down a path that he's not down. Calder, I think you should shard on the door. Yeah, it's time to shard on the door. Definitely gonna change the name. It's time to go. Calder shoves shard into the eye Yeah, you take that's gonna get pink eye you take your ice sword and you put it through the eye and you see dark blood
Starting point is 00:26:41 oozes out from an opening there and appears bad sign and then It cracks open Inviting and Call, you feel your sword pulling you towards the other door. Do you want to open that door, Callie? Yeah, I'll go over and open the door. Callie, you open that door. And you see a room that is dark at first, but you see magical braziers and torches light as soon as your feet touch the floor and there is a massive cave here with walls of blue ice and thousands of detailed carvings it does
Starting point is 00:27:17 not look like it's a full dungeon it looks like it's a large room oh do you mind if I look at these I I can catch up with you. No, we'll, we'll come. Let's let's just do this. Like we might get information from all these pictographs. Yeah. And we know there are friends in the caves. Yeah. Let's let's try to get as much info and Intel as we can. I'm gonna hold my torch up to light up all these right on as we can. I'm gonna hold my torch up to light up all these images. So you go in, everybody give me perception checks or investigation checks. Dirty 20. Nat 1. Okay. 12. Okay. I immediately panic and cast Blade Ward on myself. So I'll say Kali and Saul, you guys look around and Kali, you're, you I think are overwhelmed by the.
Starting point is 00:28:12 High of the ceiling. By just the mass of it all. Does it feel like almost spiritual? Is there like almost like a shrine? Is this imbued with some, something that was sacred to someone? It doesn't feel or is it just the cold and the history that's making it feel hollowed i think more the latter
Starting point is 00:28:33 i think more that hollowed not hallowed yeah hallowed but i mean it is carved out ice so it's hollowed and it's hollowed and hallowed okay um but calder you look at it and you recognize some events that happened in Bohemia's history. This seems to be, and you kind of piece together that these look to be the writings of somebody who's trying to predict like major apocalypse scenarios in Bohemia. You recognize some of the stuff as events that have already happened long, long ago, the destruction of the plane. When the gods first walked among the humanoids here, and then you see diverging paths, some of them, things that have happened, some of them,
Starting point is 00:29:18 things that didn't, you see a lot of focus on the giant and, and dragon wars, probably because you, you guys all get the sense that, and especially you, Callie, with your sword, you get the sense that these are Ariox's predictions, or at the very least his writings. Is this like the idea, like they would become unfrozen and this would be like the primer of like, this is everything that's happened.
Starting point is 00:29:43 Now go out into the world. It looks like a personal thing, Like he was trying to work it out himself. Like a bunch of possibilities like branching trees. Yeah, it's essentially his notes. Is this divination? Is it divination? I have divine sense. It does. It is divination magic. Yes. And Calder you recognize
Starting point is 00:30:03 you see things that did not happen. You see like futures where giants rule over the Material Plane. You see ones where dragons do. You see the current timeline with small folk taking over. But as it gets towards the future, you do see a fog over it. see a fog over it and amongst the thousands of carvings here you do see a big piece in the middle of the wall that is an image of Ariox and next to him there is a small arctic fox and as Calder is up there reading and everything and as you guys are all looking around at all the different pictures and notes, you hear a deep moan from beyond the wall. At first it sounds like the cracking or the shifting of ice, but it begins to take on the sound of a familiar melody, Callie.
Starting point is 00:31:02 You recognize the song that your mother used to hum. Really? And as the song plays, you see a ghost phases through the wall, taking the form of an arctic fox. And the fox sniffs the air. Ah, I have been waiting for you. For us. All of us? Perform the most formal fey curtsy. With all the trappings.
Starting point is 00:31:33 It's sort of like a pirouette into a curtsy. I eloquently bow and put my hand out for the fox to sniff it and get the scent. I do kind of a please don't eat me gesture, but in reverence. You see the Arctic Fox just normal Fox size because Aureox in his normal form would, you know, be as tall as Callie, maybe a little bit taller. You see the Fox walks over to Callie, gives her a sniff and goes,
Starting point is 00:32:01 You smell like him. Do I? Yeah. What do I smell like? Spearmint and tea leaves. Yes. Really? Yes. She stole that from Calder's bathroom.
Starting point is 00:32:13 That's what my mother smelled like. You see a sort of knowing look in the fox's eyes and the Fox nods and then she goes over to Saul and gives him a little sniff. Saul Beaufort, nice to meet you. Nice to meet you. What is your name? My name is Lumi. I was the animal companion of Ariox. Lumi. It's Lumi. Nice to meet our friend in a place like this. Thank you. yes. And you, goes over to you. Smell me, smell me. You smell familiar. I've been waiting for you to come back.
Starting point is 00:32:52 Come back? You've been here once before. When was that? When your mother came. Hmm... She was carrying me. Uh, the fox nods. Calder sinks down.
Starting point is 00:33:08 I am one of two spirits here. The spirit who haunts the ice knife is behind the other door. Yeah, I think that's where we're heading. Right. I was left here by Aureaks to guide you, to give you guidance. Does Auriaks hunt these wolves too? Ah, that is a complicated question. Best if I showed you something first. Okay.
Starting point is 00:33:39 Of course, you need to sniff Kena first though. Hi. What does she smell like? Am I gonna be a knight? And you see she goes over and sniffs Kena and then looks at Keta. Do you really want to know? No. Okay good because that might you know, I don't want to give anything away. I don't want to give anything away. A true knight knows without note. But you see Lumi sort of pads over and goes over to the wall and settles on a carving of an eladrin and a cyclops locked in deadly combat. And she goes, go on, touch it. It's
Starting point is 00:34:17 going to be scary. Just so you know. Okay. All right. I hold up a trembling hand, and then I shake off my fear, and I shove my fist on it. Nothing's scarier than having a dagger named Shard when Grekker's your brother. Shard, did you say?
Starting point is 00:34:33 No, I didn't. But I might as well, Calder slams his hand against the wall. I slam my hand on top of theirs. Kenna joins hands with you guys. You guys all touch the wall wall and it triggers a vision. When you blink and open your eyes, you are suddenly in another chamber watching a Cyclops Knight with heavy black armor and spiked pauldrons holding up a beaten and bedraggled Aureox. He still has a degree of elegance even in this precarious position.
Starting point is 00:35:07 His frost-covered armor has been pounded and misshapen, but his demeanor remains cool as he looks at the Cyclops with frosty sapphire eyes. Is this my first time seeing Ariox? You saw an outline of him, of his spirit joining the rest of your ancestors from the King's Hammer But you don't know that that was it's inexact, but it's inexact you you've never seen him fully But here is an image of Ariax and you see appears
Starting point is 00:35:39 Confident like he has a plan even though this Cyclops has clearly bested him in physical combat he has a plan even though the Cyclops has clearly bested him in physical combat. You see that Ariox is holding a glowing blue longsword that dangles from his left hand etched with Sylvan runes and you sense that this is the Ice Knife. You guys just get a feeling in your gut looking at it. It looks like these two have been fighting. The Cyclops is a little banged up but yes. Sorry, I was just, I was thinking about mansplaining it to Callie. That's the ice knife.
Starting point is 00:36:12 It looks like these two have been fighting and the Cyclops pulls him in and speaks to him with such venom that he's just, just blood and spit coming out with every word. You hear the Cyclops go, You froze our allies, closed the gate to the Feywild, and locked out our reinforcements. We were winning. We could have hunted down every last dragon, crushed the Smallfolk and their puny cities.
Starting point is 00:36:44 Tridor! See the cyclops disarms Ariox, takes the ice knife, and stabs it through his chest. As the eladrin coughs and wheezes, he gasps out his last words. I die a traitor in the eyes of a tyrant. You die a fool. See Ardeox grabs the sword and sends a wave of frozen energy through it, creating shards of ice that pierce the cyclops through the chest and head. The giant's gasp is cut short by the killing blow and both combatants freeze in place,
Starting point is 00:37:23 frozen in a sick statue of death. You guys return in front of this wall and the Fox spirit. Fuck it, I'm calling this dagger shard for sure. Who was that? Who did this to Aureox? The Cyclops was named Radak. He was a paladin of Grompsh, a minor warlord at the start of the war, but his influence grew throughout the campaign. The giants originally fled the Feywild to escape the courts and crowns, but once they started winning, Rhaedac used it as a means to empower himself,
Starting point is 00:38:06 and Ariox saw a potential future where Radak named himself king of the material plane and could not allow that to happen. So he froze everyone to protect them from a future that was bad. It's complicated. At the end of his life, Ariox realized the price of his meddling. His involvement in the war with the giants was originally because of visions that dragons
Starting point is 00:38:36 would destroy this plane. And then once he joined the side of the giants, he began to have visions of the giants taking over this plane. Once he saw that Raedac was potentially going to repeat what the fake courts had done to create magical crowns to rule over the people here, he decided to stop the campaign. He didn't want to... Have them flee from one king to another.
Starting point is 00:39:10 Yes, but wise as he was, he was quite conflicted at the end. I believe his sacrifice was as much an act of contrition as it was to kill Raydac. The allies that are frozen did they want to rule as well or did they want what our reacts wanted their Allegiances sort of ran the gamut there were some that just wanted to be free of the crowns of the Feywild and There were some that saw this as a means to seize
Starting point is 00:39:47 power here in the Material Plane. The tone of the war changed once Radak gained enough power, and he was about to be made the commander general of the entire army. So they were some reluctant allies of Radak, and some reluctant allies of Radak and some enthusiastic allies of Radak but all of them hate the crowns. Okay and Radak is is he waiting for us behind that other door? Part of him is so some ghosts are a physical manifestation of the soul. Others are raw emotion, echoes of the moment of death. Spirit we are dealing with is the latter. These two, she
Starting point is 00:40:37 gestures to the carving of the two fighting. These two tangled in endless combat. Aureox's desire to protect the Iceknife. Radak's desire to destroy the weak. Aureox's trickery. Radak's cruelty. It is this last moment manifested. The spirit is not something that can be reasoned with. It is not one of them manifested, or even both of them manifested. It is not one of them manifested or even both of them manifested.
Starting point is 00:41:06 It is an echo of this one moment. I call the spirit Havoc. Havoc. And does the spirit bear Aureox's contrition? I believe it does to a certain extent. Havoc's combination of cruelty and trickery lends to a sort of gamesmanship. And the four of you are uniquely worthy opponents.
Starting point is 00:41:33 You have a connection to the giants and the ice knife itself, a connection to the Feywild and to Ariox. You have suffered great betrayals at the hands of the enemy you wish to stop. To Havoc, you are no enemy, no ally. You are a rival. And that means that you get a chance. You get a chance to challenge. Could Gowen be over there challenging Havoc right now? Could Gowan be over there challenging Havoc right now? She goes over and sniffs you and nods solemnly.
Starting point is 00:42:12 He did not seek my counsel. Then he's at a disadvantage already. May I ask one last question? A personal one. Of course. Auriach's died contrite. My mother also died in a position of penance and I believe she felt contrition. Is this, is this the fate of all of his ancestors to reenact this?
Starting point is 00:42:42 She goes over and sniffs you and gives you a nice animal companion-like head bump and rubs up against you and shakes her head and goes, No, no, the future is still foggy. Beyond it lies all matter of possibility. Okay. I get down and I rub a real good behind the ears. And then I whisper in it as I rub it. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:43:16 I needed to hear that. She licks your hand. I lick hers. Interesting. I sniff her. Hey, Call Kelly, come on. You're really getting in there. What does she smell like though? Spearmint and tea leaves. Familiars always smell like they're, you know, the person that they work with. Yeah. Yeah. Alvin and I use the same old spice. Yeah. It's actually really similar to that. Yeah. You know, learning from my friend's mistakes, I try not to divulge too much,
Starting point is 00:43:51 but seeing as your mother is not currently with us, I can tell you something that I was able to divine from your scent. Your mother had Ariax's gift. What is Ariax's gift? To see visions of the future. She could see the future and she did everything she did only for a humiliating public execution.
Starting point is 00:44:23 Why would she have done any of that? You see the fox pads over to the wall and points her nose at a picture of you here in this moment. You got here, didn't you? Oh my God. Oh. You got here didn't you? Oh my god Oh All this time I thought it was just simple greed that motivated her And I thought I just wasn't greedy enough for her
Starting point is 00:45:03 I'm gonna rub this in fucking Cyrus face. I'm a paladin and I make oaths and I'm gonna fucking rub this in Cyrus face. It's a carving in the wall. Yeah. Can I put like a piece of paper and sketch it, you know? Do a rubbing. Yeah, I'm gonna do a rubbing.
Starting point is 00:45:22 Yeah, you do a rubbing of, yeah, you see, you guys are on the fucking wall there. You see Saul, Calder, and Callie. They make me look really tall. I take it and I make that rubbing and I put it as close to my heart as I possibly can, tuck it in. The gift, as Ariox learned, is also a curse.
Starting point is 00:45:44 Your mother, and hopefully she will get to tell you herself one day, likely was afraid to affect your future. God, she just knew what was coming, and that's why she kept me at an arm's distance. Yes, she seems to have inherited Aureox's penchant for cold, calculating actions in the present to secure a better future. They don't make for the best parents. At times they don't make for the best friends. I can't believe she never told us about this. I guess she couldn't have. She probably saw a future where she told us and let us in on a secret. And it didn't go right. It didn't go well. And it didn't go right. It didn't go well
Starting point is 00:46:46 She made this the greatest sacrifice for her favorite daughter For what it's worth Callie when we saw our yaks He smiled the same way you do Really? Yeah. I don't know if you've inherited all of his gifts, but you've certainly got his trickery. Dude definitely smelled like tea leaves too.
Starting point is 00:47:11 Big time. It's really pungent. It's really pungent. I love it. For sure, for sure. I really do. Yeah, it fills a room. Okay, well, I desperately wish I could sit here and ask you everything that you know
Starting point is 00:47:25 about Aureox and my mother, but I think we have an appointment with Gawain. Just one more question. Of course. Who's a good fox? Who's a good fox? Start swocking around your legs, rubbing up against you. Me, me, me, me.
Starting point is 00:47:44 Me, me, me, me, me. Me, me, me, me, me. Me, me, me, me. Me, me, me, me. Me, me, There we are. Me, me, me. You're a good fox. Do you want some pancakes? Yes. OK. And you're not supposed to have this, bud. Starts eating some pancakes. Damn. Howdy, Nadpoles.
Starting point is 00:47:53 Caldwell here with a quick question from Bombas. How is your sock drawer looking? Personally, mine is actually not a drawer. It's a bookshelf that I've been using as a sock drawer since I was in my 20s. And it's also got all my underwear in it. And if you were wondering, it's a bookshelf that I've been using as a sock drawer since I was in my 20s, and it's also got all my underwear in it, and if you were wondering, it is too crowded, and yes, most of the socks are constantly falling to the floor. It is a bad system, and the only thing that makes it tolerable is how goddamn good the socks I'm shoving in this shelf are. You know why? Because
Starting point is 00:48:21 they are Bambas socks, friends, aka the best socks I've ever owned. Once you try Bamba's, you will never look at socks the same way again. They've obsessed over details like foot hugging honeycomb arch support, anti-blister tabs, and cushioned foot beds that feel like little pillows for your feet. No matter how much of a mess your life and sock bookshelf are, Bamba Socks give you that extra bit of support you need to stay confident and also comfy. And if that wasn't enough, Bombas has a one-purchased-equals-one-donated mission. Every time you buy their socks, tees, or underwear,
Starting point is 00:48:56 you also donate essential clothing to someone facing homelessness. To date, Bombas has donated over 100 million clothing items and counting. So get comfy this spring and give back with Bombas. Head to bombas.com slash pawpaw and use code pawpaw for 20% off your first purchase. That is B O M B A S dot com slash pawpaw and use code pawpaw at checkout. See ya. See ya! if you wanted to watch a movie like, let's say, Joe Dirt. He just turned on Comedy Central. But now, if you want to watch it, you have to download an app called Bwongle, which says it's ad-free, but when you actually open it up, you find out that Joe Dirt is only available if you buy the Bwongle Platinum package, which includes Dwingus TV and something
Starting point is 00:49:58 called Chode Zone Prime. You don't know what those are, but you sign up for a free trial anyway. Six months later, you read a news article that says that Bwongle has gone out of business. Whether you want to admit it or not, you've been Bwongled. But don't worry folks, Rocket Money is here to help. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so that you can grow your savings. Rocket Money has over 5 million users and has saved a total of 500 million in cancelled subscriptions.
Starting point is 00:50:33 They also save their members an average of $740 a year when using all the app's features. So stop wasting money on things you don't use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to rocketmoney.com slash papa. That is rocketmoney.com slash papa. Rocketmoney.com slash papa. Okay, that's it for me. Enjoy the show and beware the bwongler. You do see, as you guys go to leave, she appears in front of you as you guys head for the door
Starting point is 00:51:09 and she goes, I don't know exactly what challenges await you, but in the end, I doubt you will be able to get to the planar key without lifting the curse. The only way to kill Havoc is to shatter the statue holding the ice knife in place. Okay. The sculpture of the two of them locked in combat. Break the embrace. Break the embrace. And I will confess to having some personal stake
Starting point is 00:51:38 in the curse being lifted. Will you be reunited? You see she looks excited and nods her head. Oh, let's do some quick grooming. Quick grooming. She starts licking herself. Help her file her nails down a little bit. Yeah, you see Lumi disappears back into the wall.
Starting point is 00:52:02 Okay, well, we know we're all supposed to be here and we don't know what happens next. Yeah, we walk into the fog now. We're doing it together. Yeah. Let's edge the next panel. Let's do it. Sweet, so you guys go.
Starting point is 00:52:19 I mark this on the map because I want this to become like a temple for diviners to come from all over Bohemia to study here. Yeah. Do you ever feel it, Callie? I don't think I do at all. A glimpse of the future? I try to sniff both of them.
Starting point is 00:52:38 You sniff both of them and of course you don't get anything, but there is, there's more wall behind the mist. Okay. Do you, do you want to look? It's ice though, couldn't it melt and become different? Maybe we can still write it ourselves. Maybe the only way to write it ourselves is if we don't know. Yeah, I was going to say if we look at it, do we ruin it? I think we make our own destiny.
Starting point is 00:53:02 If we look at it, do we ruin it? I think we make our own destiny. Yeah. Yeah. I think that everything we've seen gives us a clear enough path. We know what we're fucking carving in there. Let's melt our way through. Let's do it. Let's carve. Sweet.
Starting point is 00:53:18 You guys. That's my sculpt. You guys leave this divination. I am gonna keep an eye out for divination moments though. Yeah. I'm like, Whoa, maybe all of my feelings were actually like gut instincts that were actually leading me towards my destiny. You guys exit and see that the Grimstor has cracked open since you guys have plunged the Shard in there.
Starting point is 00:53:46 Going with shard. Uh, yeah. I-I stepped through. You guys enter. You see as Calder walks in, this one is not as inviting. The other one, like, you step the foot in. All these, like, magical lights went up.
Starting point is 00:54:02 You see Calder disappears as he walks in. We should have just peeked out a couple panels. They could kill me! You step to foot in, all these like magical lights went up. You see Calder disappears as he walks in. We should have just peeked out a couple panels, just a couple panels to see what was coming. Why didn't we do that? Kenna rushes in and dives into the darkness. I'm gonna cast Blade Ward on myself and join them. Everybody take a torch.
Starting point is 00:54:18 Yeah, I do have torches. You all enter this door and quickly feel it slam behind you before refilling with ice and frost. You see it just turns into a wall of ice behind you, just turning into a smooth wall. You are on an icy floor here. You just see frost below you with a dark abyss all around you. And suddenly you guys hear a deep crack in the ice and feel an earthquake as four ice sculptures appear. There's one of Calliope holding her sword up to the sky with Foster on her shoulder.
Starting point is 00:54:51 You see Foster jumps up and does the same pose on you, Calliope. Oh, Foster, I'm sorry, I didn't introduce you to the fox. I'm so sorry. You see, shrugs. There's one of Kenna with her hammer at the ready. Saul has two enlarged fists in a fighting stance and Calder stands holding his great sword, Chard, in his hands.
Starting point is 00:55:12 Do you think that your brother walked in and saw this or did he see a statue of himself? How tricky are these chambers? I yell at Ice Calder, did you tell him the name of the sword? Even Gowd will laugh at that. You see just frozen ice sculpture. Stay still, stay still. But after a moment, you guys see a message being scrawled out in the frost beneath your feet as if by an invisible finger.
Starting point is 00:55:38 You see F-R-I. You see the ghost has written friends. Friends? Suddenly the sculptures begin to shake, then shatter, sending icicles as sharp as knives rocking towards you. Not friendly. Everybody go ahead and give me deck saving throws. OK. Careful of the shards.
Starting point is 00:56:01 Thief. 14. 8. 24. OK. Saul is the only one who dodges it. Saul gets out of the way. Nice try. There's only two of me. See, it actually was a really nice try and hit everybody else. Everyone else just gets stabbed by icicles. You see your friends are just full of icicles. The try was too nice. Oh, they can short it on. You guys all take 16 damage, except for Saul, who takes none. And you guys see cuts across your body from these icicles. Blood begins to dribble down from your wounds. And as it drips onto the floor, you see the blood begins to gather together,
Starting point is 00:56:39 and you see a new message scrawled in blood. Friends betray. The ground beneath you begins to crack and shake, rising up to create a circular platform about 30 feet in diameter. As the platform rises, you see black smoke filled with twisted spectral faces begin to snake around it.
Starting point is 00:57:01 As the platform settles in place, you see a huge chunk of ice shoots out of it, like a giant crystal stalagmite. From within the ice, a frozen sculpture of Gawain Kilday bursts out and begins swinging his sword. Everybody go ahead and roll initiative. Oh! Whoa!
Starting point is 00:57:20 18. 10. 28. All right, so you felt the platform lift up. You're in a 30 foot in diameter circular platform of ice. It's got like frost. It's not like super slippery. You see whirling terrified souls
Starting point is 00:57:37 and smoke going around the platform. So it looks like if you were to fall off, you would fall a few dozen feet, probably like 30 feet, and take some damage from whatever the fuck's going on there. Tell me where you guys would position yourselves as you felt this platform rising. Do you think you'd group together in the center,
Starting point is 00:57:57 spread out, what do you guys think you would do? I know it's not good for battle, but I think that my instinct is Havoc sees us as a rival. So I'm gonna go to the center stand tall, fighting stance. I was imagining all of us back to back in the center. So we're a group but facing any. I know it's not strategically good, but it's just right for this moment.
Starting point is 00:58:17 She's slanking. So yeah, Kenna joins you guys in the middle here. So everybody's 15 feet away from the edge right now. At the top of the round, that is Saul. Saul, you see this big frozen Gawain has this big frozen sword and is getting ready to swing down on you guys. Okay, yeah, I'm gonna rush forward and say,
Starting point is 00:58:37 whatever you do, don't ask Caldera sword's name. The ice sculptures face cracks to make a confused brow and at that exact moment of confusion I'm gonna leap up and attack sweet alright take two attacks yep oh shout out to the two crew and shout out to the 20 friend II oh yeah 20 honey that is a net 20 weird way to nat 20. I'm trying out a new thing. Everyone says nat 20. I like 20 hunnies. You see the ice sculpture of Gowan
Starting point is 00:59:11 looks extremely confused when he just brings up the sword. This seems to just be like an elemental, not actually Gowan or anything. In that moment of confusion, Saul runs up and literally cracks it across the face. Yeah. For real. And that's gonna be a 13 across the face. Yeah. Yeah. And that's going to be a 13 on the first hit.
Starting point is 00:59:28 Misses. I'll go ahead and embiggen my fist. That's a three. So 16. That actually does hit. Hell yeah. Yeah, just a big, big ice dude. So I whirl back around and hit him on the second one.
Starting point is 00:59:41 You hit him on the second one. And you see the ice sculpture of Gawain looks down at you, Calder, and goes, Calder, why weren't you faster on the jump? You're going to let your little friend do all of the work? You should have been up earlier doing drills. Oh my god, he's a rise and grind guy? You didn't tell us that about Gawain?
Starting point is 01:00:03 That's not him. You're not Gowan. It sounds a lot like Mr. Killday. I think he is kind of a rise and grind guy. Definitely, but he doesn't say it. And I'll go ahead and do a bonus action for two more hits. Right on. 17 and 22. Both hit. All right great. That's gonna be four hits. hits. So just literal flurry of blows as you pound into this ice sculpture. Literally the shape of his face changes as you chip away pieces of him. Now you look like Gregor. I kick a mullet into him. All right, cool. Let me add up this damage. It's gonna be 54 damage. Nice. Wow. Saul smashes half of Ice Gowen's face off. Yeah. Try to rise and grind now. Why would this stop me from rising and grinding? I don't know. You'd have to like add more to your morning routine or something.
Starting point is 01:01:00 That's fine. I get up that early. Fine. I follow the rocks. I'm gonna put you out of your misery. Yeah. After Saul's turn, Havoc is going to take a legendary action. What? He's going to spend two.
Starting point is 01:01:14 You guys see a message in blood appear on the platform that says, run. Everybody give me wisdom saving throws. Oh no. As it casts compulsion on you. 15. Okay, that fails. 16.
Starting point is 01:01:31 Fails. 23. Passes. I also got a 16. Okay, Calder and Callie, you guys see the spirits that are surrounding the outside suddenly appear in the middle and you just instinctually fall back, run backwards and run to the edge of the ice. This spell can't make you jump off a cliff or anything, but you guys run right to the edge and then...
Starting point is 01:01:52 Whoa! Your vision comes back and, Saul, you see that Cali and Calder have run right to the edge, hovering right over the soul. Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hey, guys, guys! I just think, actually, maybe this fight is a bad idea. Everyone back here? I was just edging. Yeah, I was just guys. I just think actually maybe this fight is a bad idea. Everyone back here. I was just edging. Yeah, I was just edging because it's hot and sexy.
Starting point is 01:02:09 After the legendary action, that is actually Calder's turn. So you're actually OK. OK, so I'm good to run back and attack. You can use your movement. So you use 15 feet of movement to run back. So the only one in danger right now is Callie. OK. Maybe you could name your sword edging.
Starting point is 01:02:26 That's, oh, that's interesting. Or just edge. Shard edge. Is that good? Is that anything? You see Gowan, even as by the book as Gowan is, the giant ice sculpture starts to laugh. Ha ha, your sword is called Shard?
Starting point is 01:02:40 I'm mom's favorite. I attack him. Take all three swings. That's a 21, a 24, and a 28. All three hit. Nice. 41 damage. You break away a bunch of Gawain's core
Starting point is 01:02:56 and you see the sculpture is getting smaller and smaller. Great. I'm gonna use a charge from the helm too and add two D12. Oh, hell yeah. Huge. That's gonna be another 13 damage Okay, you see that this Gowan has been shaved down so much and is suddenly at your height Wow rise and grind we're like fall and Ball and ball ball. So I awesome. Yeah, I know like cry ball. Yeah, some no
Starting point is 01:03:23 Okay Yeah, no, like cry ball. The awesome ball. No, like cry a lot. Okay. Cry a lot. Interesting. Calder starts crying a lot. Cry a lot, you know what I mean, you asshole. That is the Gowan Statue's turn. He is going to use his movement. Calder, you get a opportunity attack, but you see the Gowan Statue is going to turn and try to run to Bull Rush Callie.
Starting point is 01:03:43 Oh, um, I'm just going to try to grapple him. I'm going to try to Bull Rush Callie. Oh, I'm just gonna try to grapple him. I'm gonna try to for the same size. Go ahead and do an opposed athletics check against Little Gowen. Little Gowen. Just a Little Gowen. Just a Little Gow. Gow thin.
Starting point is 01:03:58 22. You successfully grapple him. Wow. So you grapple him with the opportunity attack. Fall and ball I said. Alright, I'm gonna ball, I'm gonna dribble your head on the ground. Why? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:04:12 So he's going to instead not use his movement, take his turn to make some attacks on Calder. So you see, uses his ice sword and swings down on Calder. First attack is a dirty 20 to hit? That'll hit. Okay. Time out, time out. 25 damage. Oh boy.
Starting point is 01:04:29 All right, I'm gonna use my stones endurance and shrug off some of that. Sweet, yeah. You kind of turned yourself to ice. You see these two ice covered brothers pounding on each other. Time out I said. Next one is only a 16 to hit.
Starting point is 01:04:43 So you- That one misses. You hold your sword up, you hold shard up and block the attack. Time out, I said! Next one is only a 16 to hit. That one misses. You hold your sword up, you hold Shard up, and block the attack. After the Statue's turn, Havoc is going to take a turn. It is going to attempt to cast Crown of Madness on Saul. Saul, go ahead and give me a wisdom saving throw. Oh! No crowns, no courts! You see, ha ha ha, ironic.
Starting point is 01:05:12 Ha ha ha! They're playing right into my flip and quip mindset. You text like my mom. Holy shit, that 20! Yeah! 20 frinnies! Give it up for my 20 frinnies! You shake it off.
Starting point is 01:05:24 You see the crown shatters as soon as it touches your head. After that legendary action, that is Kenna's turn. Kenna is going to run over and I guess just use her hammer. You see Gowen's looking pretty small at this point. He's grappled, right? So she gets advantage? Yeah. Oh no, she doesn't get advantage.
Starting point is 01:05:41 She would need to be restrained. Cool. She hits twice and with the pre-roll damage, she does 17 damage and you see Gawain's head shatters, busts apart. Whoa! You see the whole body cracks and breaks falling onto the ground. Callie, that is your turn.
Starting point is 01:05:57 You do not see any other combatants on the field. Havik, show your face! This isn't very sporting. You see, in the blood, shows a picture of you. Oh, I'm you, you're me? Doesn't even look like her. I kicked the blood in the snow. I'm gonna run back to the center.
Starting point is 01:06:18 Okay. And can I like prepare a reaction to attack if another like- Yeah, you can. Body shows up. So Callie, I'll let you tell me how you would react to this. So you just ready your sword, you get ready. I'll say you even like kind of delay your turn.
Starting point is 01:06:34 You get ready to go. Am I allowed to get a smite going? Am I allowed to cast a bonus action spell and then use my action? You prepare your reaction as an action. Yes. So I think we just fought this like icy creature. So I think I'm gonna whisper some words of fate trickery into my sword and all the ice crystals are gonna erupt
Starting point is 01:06:55 into white hot flames. Ooh, fire appears on Callie's sword as you see the snowflake glows. At the end of the round, you feel cold air pick up around you and an object materializes out of thin air. A giant hourglass made of thick ice with snow in place of sand trickling down. Based on the snow in the bottom half of this device,
Starting point is 01:07:22 it looks like one quarter of the time has passed. So it seems like it's tracking rounds of combat. So Callie, you see this enormous hourglass of ice appears. What is this? Boggle, what's going on here? I think I'm gonna wait for a legitimate combatant. Right on. After that, that is Solstern.
Starting point is 01:07:43 So we've got this hourglass. We've got this like swirling tornado of spirits to the side of us or all around us. I guess I'll try to talk to the spirits. Sure. Yeah, I kind of like run up to the side, almost like a basketball player, like slapping hands with everyone after scoring a basket. Sweet. Give me a constitution saving throw Suck all of the moisture from you just I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death!
Starting point is 01:08:26 I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death!
Starting point is 01:08:34 I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death!
Starting point is 01:08:42 I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death! I'm gonna death! Okay, is there anything you'd like to do at the end of your turn or you've only used barely any of your movement you And he's 15 feet to go over to the souls. It's right to eat you They do they are a literal circle of death. They do 24 damage to you I run away from like run towards them and like justice because they book it back We do not have home field advantage. That has been determined. Okay. Yeah, after that, I guess if you'll allow it, I will inspect the hourglass as well.
Starting point is 01:09:14 Right on. You said that like a quarter of the sand had fallen? Yeah, you inspect it. It looks to, you touch it. It is physical. It is there. It looks like it was probably magically conjured by the spirit, but it is a physical thing that is there it looks like it was probably magically conjured by the spirit Mm-hmm, but it is a physical thing that is there. I've already done one reckless thing I'm just gonna like position myself next to it. I'm not gonna do anything yet right on okay after Saul's turn Havoc is going to take a legendary action. Okay. I'm gonna attack the Before Havoc like activate before the legendary action goes Okay, I'm gonna attack the, I'm gonna attack this hourglass. Before Havoc, like activate it. Before the legendary action goes, Callie, you turn and you take a swing on the hourglass. Great. Oh, am I on licorice? Is that how big is the hourglass? Oh yeah, the serpents are there. How big is the hourglass? The hourglass is fucking huge. Oh, so then I wouldn't have advantage. Okay. Oh, yeah, yeah, the hourglass is a large structure. 26 on my first attack. Hits. Okay, my Searing Smy activates.
Starting point is 01:10:07 Okay, so give me the fire separately because you do see, Kali, as you strike this, the hourglass structure starts to kind of melt away. Like it is made of ice, it's not actual glass. And you see the blood begins to write out, hey, no fair! Exclamation point. So that is 16 points fire damage. And you see the blood begins to write out. Hey, no fair exclamation point So that is 16 points fire damage. I'm also gonna do 32 points of fire damage
Starting point is 01:10:32 a lot more so 32 points fire damage. Let me do my smites With that fire damage it becomes 72 damage on my first attack. Wow, on your first attack? Jesus. You see the integrity of this hourglass, round glass, whatever you want to call it, is, it is breaking apart. May I take my second attack?
Starting point is 01:11:00 Jesus, yes. 17 to hit. 17 does hit. Just a big piece of ice. There is like a damage threshold, but it's not hard to hit. It's just staying in place. You do see as Cali's hitting it and like rocking it,
Starting point is 01:11:16 the snow from the top that is dripping like sand in an hourglass starts to fall faster as it's like shaking and being forced through. All right. 37 more damage. My God, this thing is on its last legs. Now it looks like a proper hourglass. It literally looks like it is just glass at this point.
Starting point is 01:11:33 It is so thin, but continues to wind down not even halfway there yet. After Kali's turn, Havoc is going to take a legendary action and is going to cast Conjure Elemental. You see a blizzardy air elemental appears from underneath Kali. I need you guys all to roll me strength saving throws to not get blown away by this whirlwind
Starting point is 01:12:00 that's trying to throw you off the platform. All right. Ugh, nine. Kenna passes. off the platform. All right. Nine. Nine. Kenna passes. 19. Okay. Nat one. Saul and Kali are flung 20 feet away from the elemental
Starting point is 01:12:14 in a random direction and knocked prone. So you guys both fall off the edge. Oh shit. Into the necrotic swirl of souls. You guys feel them pull at you and try to like drag you to fucking hell with them. You guys both take, go ahead and give me constitution saving throws
Starting point is 01:12:32 as you fall into the smoking swirling souls. Guys. Oh, really good constitution save, 23. Okay, you just take half, you take 13. Okay. 21. Saul, you take the same. You both take 13 damage. Kena just yells,
Starting point is 01:12:48 guys, are you okay? Yeah, I'm fine. You guys also just dink down 30 feet and hit the ground. Saul, automatic. Actually, you know what? I'm gonna roll with prone. I'm gonna say you're gonna take regular damage. You guys are knocked prone from the air elemental,
Starting point is 01:13:03 so you're gonna fall and just like hit the ground. Okay. Could I have used my reaction to look at the helm and teleport to it? No, that's an action to teleport to. Okay, cool, cool. You only take five damage. I rolled very bad on the D6s from falling,
Starting point is 01:13:16 so you guys just kind of like roll your ankles as you land on the ground. You guys good? I heard a pop down there. Callie, give me concentration checks for your searing smite. I passed both my concentration checks, the time the little hourglass is still on fire.
Starting point is 01:13:31 Okay, ah, that's bad. Oh my God, it's still on fire. Is it still on fire? Yeah. Okay. Is that good, is that bad? I don't know. I think it's fine. The blood seems upset by it. It means on its turn, it's gonna take more fire damage.
Starting point is 01:13:44 Yeah, the blood just keeps saying stop cheating. I swear, yeah, the hourglass is not on our side. So Callie and Saul, you guys are at the bottom of this pit, 30 feet from the platform, and you see these souls still going around, so it looks like you'll have to go through them again unless you use Misty Step or something like that. So I'm just underneath the ice watching the shadows of everyone fighting. Very cool.
Starting point is 01:14:07 I take a small moment to appreciate that. Don't look at my kilt. Calder, are you wearing two pairs of underwear? Yes, cause I'm afraid no one's gonna look at my kilt. Calder, that is actually your turn. So you do see the glass looks like it's almost ready to shatter and Ketta looks at you and goes I don't know. What do you think?
Starting point is 01:14:28 It seems like it can't be that bad of an idea, right? I'll take three attacks on it. Okay, wow, that's a nat 1. Okay. 16 and a 28. So you fully on the first attack you fully whiff and miss this giant hourglass that is stationary. The light was like... Are you okay? Mr. Kildare! Did you think he could set the fire? Were you charmed? Do you have the crown of madness? Yeah, I was frightened. I was told to run, but I overcame it. It was really actually amazing.
Starting point is 01:15:01 Ghosts are booing really loudly. They're booing everybody. They were gonna boo regardless of what I did. Yeah, then the other two hit. Okay. That is 32 damage. You shatter this device, and as you do, you see that all of the snow that was gathered at the top falls into the bottom very cleverly,
Starting point is 01:15:23 getting this challenge done way faster. Okay, okay. Than you otherwise would have. It was a good thing, I was sure of it the entire time. So you guys see. Yeah, I just waited, I wanted Saul to have a turn. That's why. The smoke and spirits surrounding the platform disperse.
Starting point is 01:15:42 Callie and Saul, you guys are raised up, like telekinetically, back onto the platform disperse. Kali and Saul, you guys are raised up like telekinetically back onto the platform. As you guys see torches go up around the room and light it up fully. You guys see a bridge of ice raises up from the pit below and connects to a far side wall where you see another door appears. And then another message is written out in front of you. It says,
Starting point is 01:16:08 Very clever. You passed the simulation. Then over the archway of the next door, you see, Beware. Real betrayal ahead. I... Guys, I'm just realizing this. you see beware, real betrayal ahead. I, guys, I'm just realizing this,
Starting point is 01:16:28 the blood messages that now on the wall could Gowan have made a deal with Radak instead of Alexandrite? I think so. Talk about betrayal. Yeah. God, it's such a fucking good move though. Having Radak protect it from Alexandrite.
Starting point is 01:16:47 I see why he did what he did. We can save him from this. Okay. Yeah. I- I gotta believe you. Let's just get to him. I don't like the phrase simulation. That sounds like something Alexandrite would say. She might be mixed up in all this too. I don't know what we're walking into, but we should be ready for anything. Yeah, whatever it is. I guess the real thing lies ahead.
Starting point is 01:17:09 Yeah. The real test lies ahead. Do you think we're gonna actually have to fight the real Gowan? I hope not. But if it comes to that, I know you'll help me. I'm gonna follow your lead. Yeah. Yeah. I love my brother, but he made a choice. He's been right his whole life, but he might have finally got something wrong.
Starting point is 01:17:32 And that's where we'll end our session. Gotta end it on a killer line like that. I'm so scared. Thank you all so much for listening. We'll be over on our Patreon talking about this, patreon.com slash nadpod. That's N-E-D-D-P-O-D. Don't sing yet. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Starting point is 01:17:50 Don't do it. Does anybody have anything they'd like to plug? I do. Oh. Drink tart cherry juice. OK. OK. It makes your dreams a little wackier.
Starting point is 01:18:03 What? Is this? Fascinating. Absolute yawned energy. Wait a minute, is this a sleepy girl mocktail? What's going on here? I mean, you could call it that. I just like read online that your dreams are more vivid
Starting point is 01:18:15 if you drank tart cherry juice and I did it and my dreams are a little more potent and I even had a lucid dream one. Whoa. So you have to drink it right before bed or is it just like anytime? Yeah, I pour it into like a wine glass, so it is like a mocktail.
Starting point is 01:18:27 I make a celebration of it. I know you've been drinking that, but you didn't tell me about your vivid dreams, or lucid dreams. Yeah, because they're not about you, dude. Yeah. Lucid dreams are really fun. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:18:38 The eagle you're writing says, don't tell Murph about this. Yeah, geez, all right. They really are that epic. It's great. I exclusively have luc all right. They really are that epic. It's great. I exclusively have lucid dreams. Really? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:18:48 You can control every single dream you have. We need to talk about that. You've never had a stomach ache, and you've never had a stomach ache, and you control your dreams. I do control my dreams. Your deal did you make. Why do you play underdog? You guys need UberDog.
Starting point is 01:19:02 You absolute motherfucker. I'm gonna dream that I kick your ass. You can try, brother. Jake will be in control. Jake and I are gonna be asleep. I'm gonna dream later that I kick your ass. Are you sometimes just like, ugh, I'm too tired to script another fantastic dream for myself? Sometimes I let them happen,
Starting point is 01:19:21 but I almost exclusively try, like as soon as I realize I'm dreaming, I just hard left turn into something else. We are going to talk more about this in a fucking short rest. Alright, you can follow us on social media that we may or may not use at CSHersMe at Caldwell, at XTRADEMILY and at JakeRhodesasJake and you can tweet about the show using hashtag NADDpod that's N-A-D-D-P-O-D. We are, we are, the youth of the nation! We are, we are, the youth of the nation! It's the end of the shore run and you know what that means. It's time to shout out our benevolent Council of Elders,
Starting point is 01:20:02 starting with Brad D, Jeffrey S, Lord of the Fjord, Hugh C, later Mick Skater, Matt N, Cutter W, Jeff C, Daniel G, Danielle, the dastardly dame, Beardman Dan, Danny P, Bryant, best friend to Nathan the Horse, Vincent W, Victor T, Balnore's boy, Bryant, best friend to Nathan the Horse. Vincent W. Victor T. Balnor's boy. Hoyt's a friend.
Starting point is 01:20:30 Justin I. Danny Danster. TJM. Trelai the Crefe. Christopher B. Damiel R. Jordan L. Cyborg version of Josh the Cobalt.
Starting point is 01:20:42 Targot. Stevie Wags. Hellish Rebuke-er PhD. R.I.P. Squeam. He died as he lived without context. Princess Yar. Jory S. Jack L.
Starting point is 01:20:56 Nicholas C. Star of every film ever made in Bohemia, now starring in the Iron Deep production, A Squire Never Tires. Samuel B. Mike H. Elka Schmelzer Plus. and now starring in the Iron Deep production, a squire never tires. Samuel B., Mike H., Elkesmeltzer Plus, Great Value Gemma, Adam G., Tyler F., Nebadger, Panama James, Heratrian, Carburet Chapel Hill FPV,
Starting point is 01:21:19 Rextanirotha White, Diana De Los Lopez, Cici Lulu, RQ Pajoso, Rabbit Falk Detective, Timmy R. Reiko, Calder Comes Cold, shout out to the cold cum companions, Frosty Facial, wow, what a phrase to land on, Taylor B. The Vengeful, One-Winged Angel, Cass, Skate angel. Cass, skateboard, Cass.
Starting point is 01:21:46 Steven speeds into seasons of Sneeze and See. Well, I wish you the best in allergy season. Mike K. Lady taco and team incredulity. Jake L. Nick W. William W. Big Bad Birdo the Mad. Ananarama, Percival Frederickstein Van Mussel, Glazowski, DeRolo the Third, J. Dragonborn, Goose Henry, The Sandrayan, Ben A. Dave H. Christian S.
Starting point is 01:22:21 A Totally Normal Vulture. I don't buy that for a second. Dustin S. Danny F. Hawkeye Pierce. Bookfarr's Assistant Izzy F. The PC is awesome! Shone, the Shade Tree Mechanic of Zelbeldar.
Starting point is 01:22:40 Summer Rose Granterre. Cat C. Misa House N'Zunza, Ariel the occasional mermaid, Selena N. Valacyraptor, B. Perky, always, Maxwell J., Lauren H. Nolani, the coffee barista brewing fighter of Bahumia, Serve 16, the bone duster. Annie, the Feywild therapist. Skillful ferret. I'd like to see Calder's mom and dad.
Starting point is 01:23:12 They're adorable. Connor Savage, Salil. Weed Goku 69, AK Gunket 16, experimenting with drugs. Bio Quirt 7 7 Amber Dextrous Sullivan H Trubb Hupdropper Jack H aka Hey Guys 8-Bit Book Club has 998 reviews on Spotify
Starting point is 01:23:34 2 more! And the scribe said his dad would guess Woohoo! Let's juice! I didn't know that, I love it Lindsey W Vaelyn Carlin C, Emily S, Noah the Bullywug Boy, hashtag release the filthy guppy cot. I've heard the filthy guppy cot.
Starting point is 01:23:54 James G, everything bago, the Aladdin who just wants to hang out with his pet badger Stripey. It's the simple things in life. Daddy Master Dandy, Hon, Eric B, Marcos, Learns the Balanced Druid, Dakota J. P., Freida M., Tracy P., the Crick-Alf Librarian, Maggie S., Holly Hyena, Giovanni the Fighter,
Starting point is 01:24:20 Akash the Car, Duvinus, Russell H., a monk named Dilgo, Cody Care, Keychain's Pentium II Processor, Lorelei the Succubus and Kira her busty queen, Tert Cobain the tortle barbarian, Matt M, your friendly neighborhood yawn and Yunkle Andrew N. Sid John Adams The Write-In Candidate for 2024 Meg The Mail Carrier of Bohemia James F. Jimmy A. M4L Austin S. Wayfarer Now Has to Do Something with the Trolls Get Rid of Them Turn turn to page 42.
Starting point is 01:25:05 Keep them, turn to page 69. Shane C. Barpo, good barrel, bird, barion. Welsh Linder. Garrett G. One big curd. Mr. D. Dana the Daisy. Ethan B.
Starting point is 01:25:19 Havy the half-orc. Renee the monster captain. Box Clifton. Olivia the Enchanting Bard who is working hard on her audition for the lead singer of The Mountain Crows, Winterslade, Sammy B, Bohemia's finest linguist, Riley S, Fico, Garrett the Artificer, Anthony the Raddest of Dudes,
Starting point is 01:25:43 Josh H, Caleb L, the raddest of dudes. Josh H. Caleb L. The fairies say om nom nom nom nom. Wow, I knew what that was just from reading it. Kanchip Dumbledore, the bear onesie wearing barbarian. Lexi H. MJ, the BFG. Cam, the frog man. Artavius Krass. Geno T, Mama Belle, Derek D, Tristan the Talentless
Starting point is 01:26:10 Honk, BTA Workshop, Shenanigans O'Connor, Mios the Great, Joshua S, Alexander, Linz W, Angel La Pamela the forever vindicated. Emma S. Red the reforged warforged. Pavu Eskinar the Goliath Paladin providing service with a smile. A breathless heaving whisper to get there. A cat napping in a sunbeam listening to a podcast. C Jam Hampton.
Starting point is 01:26:44 Shell B. Kenna's second favorite sprite girl. She's casting power word party on everyone listening. If below 150 hit points you must now limbo. Jackson R. Blake H. searching for a sweet blue hole with his bestie Big Beth. Pawpaw Sky Days. Claire and Kyle Kallam McBeth, MemawSkydays, oh it's me! Tommy W, Mike and Lisa sending love to y'all, thank you, I got it! Megan N, Hayley the Human, TheBigM, Balnor's best friend, Steve, Stephanie of House Inzunza, Jake's Ramen Shop. RIP. Melchior, the brave Leonin warrior
Starting point is 01:27:27 who even cares about the rest of the party. Benjamin A. Sacrificial Otaku pen name for Callie's cousin who discovered anime and is trying to spread the word all over Bohemia. Jiggy M. Mikkel A. Josh H.
Starting point is 01:27:43 Let's combine into Ultimate Mega Yuck Mozard 9000. Froakie. Maple, the shy bookworm. Ashley. Seth E. Billy Batson. Tori, the dragoose son of Thomas the blind bisexual goose. Bicon and father of 69 Cygnets. real goose, look him up, okay I will,
Starting point is 01:28:07 sock monkey bob, wolf wing pup on a spelljammer, broke through the blue veil and now in the space between planescapes, I think I see a squid ship, Michael Lyle as the II, Jacob P., Nova Cry, Parcel, Dex Riddlewell, Hannah A., Ace Dregs, High Lord of Critsburg, Joshua F., Darius D., Troy's Mom, Vin Diagram, Nurse Betty 141, GKCTT, and finally, Hacinator. Thank you all so much. We love you. We love what we do and you help us do what we do. And therefore we love you even more.
Starting point is 01:28:55 Mwah, mwah. Goodbye, sweeties. That was a HeadGum Podcast.

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