Tell Em Steve-Dave - #579: TESD Angels
Episode Date: December 3, 2023Thanksgiving, Black Friday blind item, Walt gives up on Git ‘em, JTHG is named mvp....
Transcript
Discussion (0)
I gotta give him the handy.
Oh.
Yeah, you gotta get those balls off, bro.
Gotta get them off right away. Get them off before you start coming all over things.
Tell them Steve Dave. Hello and welcome to this week's edition of Tell them Steve Dave.
I am here with Walt.
Chalo.
And I am here with BQ. Hello.
And in the wings, hoping to come up to the big times is, uh, get them Steve Dave.
How y'all stacking? Yeah. Keep them as quiet as possible, I think.
So let's kill that mic. Yeah, just just just put it down all the way down.
Uh, charging. Well, stop. Thank you. I came in with, uh, big plans to talk about Thanksgiving. You know,
I'm like, what did we do? Yeah. Something must have happened. So I'm really relying on you guys,
because nothing happened for me. What do you mean? Johnson family, the holiday without any stories?
No, not a one.
Woof, not a one.
No, everybody got along.
Everything was fine.
Wow, how was the turkey fryer?
Turkey went well.
I mean, I'm personally I'm happy for you,
but it's disastrous for the show.
It's, I was thinking the same thing.
I was like, should I have started something just?
You should provoke just a word?
Something to talk about.
Yeah.
You should just like, like, like,
when on a rant about somebody breaking something,
you know, and you knew it, you know,
and you're just choosing everybody.
Yeah.
Cusing somebody of touching your stuff,
you know, this always happens.
This bullshit always happens.
Like, I'm not talking to anyone directly. Just like, like, you're walking around and ranting. I fight you people into my home and this is how you treat me.
This is my house.
Mine.
This is like mid-Turkey chill looking at you.
What's in them off now?
Yeah, but there was nothing to report back of.
And I've watched a couple podcasts now.
I've been watching this for a while. I've watched a couple podcasts now where people are talking about their thanksgiving.
Yeah.
And some are pretty boring.
Uh, you need drama.
You know, if you're, if you're on a podcast and you talk about that, yeah, drama helps.
You know, it really does.
There's no bumps in the road.
You know, it's really boring to talk about like,
you know, we just had a good time.
Yeah, it was great.
It cares.
That sounds like it sucks.
And it did suck if you're wondering.
So I really hope that somebody argued
at the Flanagan Households.
Oh, no, there was arguments.
No, it was fun because my wife, I got to give it up
to her for the idea that she has a collected over the course of the years so many gift cards from
parents who give her like her for the students. Yeah. So she had all these Starbucks, we don't
go to Starbucks. She had all these Dunker donuts.
I mean, I can't even tell you the last time I was in Dunker
donuts.
You could sell them online.
You don't want to damn it.
Some porn shops buy them.
There you go.
But she had the bright idea that we were
going to have this big game with everybody.
We had 12 people in the house.
And the winning team, we had 12 people in the house and the winning team
where you split up into six on six and the winning team was going to get this stack of gift cards
and nobody knew what the gift cards were and she even sprinkled in there's a target one in there
and she didn't even know what the what the what the what the amount was.
And so like that really makes the game different.
Yeah, it really does. And so that really makes the game different. Yeah.
It really does.
I can see the competitive nature has come out, like even to my mom, who was just like
starting to scream at it.
Like, you know, like, not bad answers that our boyfriend was giving and everything.
And yes, that was fun.
But that aspect of it, like just having it to play for gift cards that we were never going to use made
for a good two hour block of, you know,
made the time fly by.
Nice.
I didn't have any extra gift cards.
Yeah.
Well, what was the game?
What was the game?
We're just stolen a bunch from far.
Thanksgiving family few that she found online.
Oh, okay.
She printed out.
She was the Richard Dawson character.
Wow, that's fun. She's got your family. Yeah, she found online. Oh, okay. She printed out. She was the Richard Dawson character. Wow, that's for the family.
Yeah, she's finally.
Good.
That's what I'm going to take into our Christmas episode,
which will be coming out closer to Christmas this year,
filming it kind of later in December,
so it's going to drop before Christmas,
but I think on the right,
like a couple days before Christmas, I'm hoping.
If not on December 24th, depending on how.
Christmas miracle.
How quickly the edit.
It needs to turn it around.
Yeah, because it's a lot.
But I'm inspired by my wife this year
to do something family-futus.
I'm like, when some gift cards mean you.
I'm sweet.
They'll just be the general store.
She gave away all the good ones now. It's just like, you know, like, uh, the Christian store.
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Where's that? The, uh, no one grabbed that.
Enhammits a school supplies.
Sell them online. Christmas tree shop. Uh, cue you want, you went down to visit your parents?
Yeah, I was down in the village's retirement community.
Somebody had to pass away in the village.
Something happened.
Something drama.
It was a perfectly lovely.
I went to a tree lighting ceremony.
People were singing.
I played, my nephew was trying to, my nephew's in the army. He's just got out of
basic. He's a scientist. Basin, Texas, where they play Magic the Gathering. That card game.
Okay. So he tried to teach it to me. And boy, did I feel like an old, a funnel,
fucking idiot. Yeah, it's like really, that's from your generation, right? Magic would have
it. Yeah, I just never got into it. Right. No, I never like really that's from your generation right magic would have yeah
I just never got into it right now
I never looked down on anything like that
But I wasn't just never got into it
But like he was telling me how much fun is to play and it is more than I thought it's like chess and
It's weird. It's very odd
But you know his young brain and knowledge just destroyed me just just destroyed me
But no fights no fights about that.
And then lovely Thanksgiving dinner.
I got the apple this year because my niece wasn't there.
Yeah.
So no competition.
My God.
I know.
And then the next night, there was a tree lighting ceremony
in one of the town squares.
And they had like a big holiday festival around it
with vendors selling all sorts of holiday-teamed gifts
and spices.
And this is what you're a fearing, right? Yeah, yep
In this fucking picture you're tuning out
I want to hear Pam was drunk
It was like American the 50s down there, man. It's like all it's time to retire and go down hold on to that every inch of it
They hold on to it. Yeah. We had pretty brisk walkthroughs on the
on at the general store for Black Friday weekend. Yeah. Yeah. Quite a few customers stop by. We
appreciate them making the effort to get by and Jimmy the hair guy. Yeah. Absolutely. Can I tell
you what I heard before you said? Oh, why was he being taken advantage of somehow? Is he?
Who said that?
Oh, no, I heard he's put to work.
It's self-imposed.
Yeah, he was again.
It's just like he is the energizer bunny, man.
Like, you know, how does the spirit of Thanksgiving
occur as one?
Yeah.
Do you power by 17 residents?
Do you know how like people will will sniff baby's heads because they want
to get that that baby's energy? You ever see that when they's like, I have and I've done
them with kittens, so I know. And they and they know they feel like it rejuvenates them
like older people. That's what I feel like when I'm around you made a hair guy.
Really? It's exuberance, his excitement, it's contagious. If I could bottle it and sell it,
I wouldn't have to do this shit no more. I would be fucking a billionaire. I'm telling you made it would it is absolutely
contagious. He saw
It was what we were like he's taken orders online for Wallace friends on Facebook and stuff
I was helping him and we're doing it in the hallway because you know the big room was used for the meet and greet
Yeah, it was watching hallway because you know the big room was used for the meet and greet.
Yeah, I was watching live guys watching the the cam.
You're welcome. Thank you again. And when there was a gentleman came out of his office and walked
by Jimmy and walked into the bathroom. And Jimmy turned around and he looked at me and whispered
he goes, was that Ron? And I shook my head, yeah. Jimmy's face was like, as if he had saw like Jimmy Hendrix
and Morrison walked by.
He was like, holy fuck!
Like he was absolutely blown away.
And then when the yarn lady came around the corner,
he was at the yarn lady.
He was beside himself.
He was just like the nervous energy,
just seeing the people that he'd heard about on the podcast.
Oh.
It's like, it's contagious.
And you just want to be around that kind of level of,
of excitement over the most mundane.
Yeah.
Shit.
So I mean, if somebody out and somebody else in,
in terms of what?
In terms of like,
Oh, we can never pay, Jimmy, what,
Jimmy's getting paid from the most office
Yeah, yeah benefits
But in a in a world where like Jimmy didn't care about what he was getting paid. Yeah, yeah, he'd be
Yeah, he would be he might he's the employee to hear there's no doubt about it
He's a employee of the he wasn't wearing a turkey suit
He he and that first turkey suit was God awful horrible. He may as well happen
though, because like that first night, we, you know, we opened it from 10 to 12 and some
people came like, Jimmy is taking orders from his Facebook. People are writing him to
him and he's like, he's showing people what we have here and then he's doing the sending and all that stuff.
Wow, man.
And his girl jumped in who is at least matched
if not exceeded his energy and focus.
Yeah, it's like, it's so foreign in TSD town.
Yeah.
Energy, it's just like, it's just like,
it's been gone, it's just like it dissipated years ago.
He's youthful.
So like, you get this injection of energy
by these youthful
TSD listeners. It's like it's like fucking mainline and angel dust
Wow, all right. I'm so jacked right now
Yeah, you tell you right now. He's about to take 60 bullets to the chest
Days later. I'm still like on a fucking Jimmy the hair guy. Hi. Wow
I'm still like on a fucking Jimmy the hair guy. Hi. Wow. I'm not just because he works for free. No, you know, no, he's I've worked for free.
He's gonna believe me. He's going to be compensated. Yeah.
And ways that are he's going. He doesn't even know about all those free tattoos he's been
getting. He's like a religion.
Work when you die. You'll get your reward. Just go keep working. He's got to sell more to get to a Sensor Level 9.
His entire experience around here is like proving himself whether it's like a Chinese buffet
where he's on a few tables.
And I think what sad is that he falls for it.
He falls for like these, like the only people he needs to like prove himself to is me.
He's already done it 10 times over.
So he time get him's like you had to prove yourself.
Like a fuck yourself.
I'm just even a fucking hair guy.
Fuck nut.
Fresh hotness. I'm just a fucking hair guy. Fuck nut fresh hotness.
Fresh fish.
You're all news.
Yeah, I'm in infusion.
I didn't see I didn't see Jimmy the hair guy gimpin' around at any point.
No.
With like, spray.
No.
Did you see how that turkey costume cut into my leg?
Yeah.
The first night he did wear this inflatable turkey costume when he took him off.
I thought he was gonna have to have his feet amp.
Oh, yeah, I did see a little negativity coming from Jimmy the Harry guy.
But at one point, he got a phone call.
I don't know if you want to reveal his health.
I do.
I don't know if he wants it.
I already talked.
I already talked.
And he gets a phone call and he's just like oh bro. Fuck that sucks. Okay. All right, and then he gets off the phone
Goes right back to work full speed ahead turns out Jimmy the hair guy
I was called from his doctor to the doctor on Wednesday and gotten some tests done all right
Thursday's Thanksgiving obviously so in the middle of Friday
His doctor calls and tells him that he is diabetes. Oh my god
And that he's gonna have to change his diet and I'm you know
Smoking and all that stuff. Yeah, but I was he has to get MVP for no other reason than like as soon as he found out
I could see it in his face. There's some concern
But not enough to slow down and let down daddy
He was comforted later by Chuck.
Well, is he? Yeah, yeah, Chuck.
It didn't seem comforting.
Those guys, like Jimmy is definitely the punching bag out of like,
if it's like,
I drink Chuck.
He's like, he's the little brother.
What do you mean? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, he is. I see, I see. No, he is the older brother. You guys give it to him way harder first.
I think it's all the pent up fucking anger
because you guys are all the punch-a-bag for us.
So then I don't see them that way.
Yeah, well I meant, yeah.
I said Jimmy is like,
so Jimmy is like,
Jimmy is like your midget older brother
who you know, you just take pot shots at all the time
because he's family. And you love love him but he gets no quarter but the
dude was hurting and you guys are still like fucking going oh fuck I'm gonna die
of an early fucking time and we're gonna strip me type two
no I said Jimmy too type
oh man it's brutal down below that son oh yeah there's a pecking order yeah
yeah and they're not gonna like it when Jimmy ascends to fuck sounds like he's ascending. Oh, yeah
There's a they're gonna be so
bitter and jealous when they find out what Jimmy's got in store
What the big the big TSD God and Sky is gonna fucking shine down on Jimmy and in 2024 really he's gonna become a baron
The pair baron Jimmy in 2024. than virgins.
Okay.
All right, when he dies.
No, he dies.
Yeah, what he dies.
He's gonna get it while he's still.
40 things.
40 massive things.
Wow, that's a big commitment, bro.
40's a lie.
You don't want to start like one.
Well, one of them, I'm just gonna go to see God's
all the way.
I'm the new God's all the way.
Oh, okay.
That's pretty good.
Just me and him.
That's pretty good.
Yeah, that's just one of them. That's better than banging for me. Yeah, that's just a minor zero. That's better than banging for a long. Oh, yeah, that's pretty good. That's pretty good. Yeah, that's just one is right. Yeah, that's better than bangin' for
Mine the zero better than bangin' over. I would you know what I would at this age I would talk to you say yes. Yeah, I think so. I don't want that responsibility. Yeah
Let's go watch a movie
Jimmy could probably convince to give you a handy in the fucking theater anyway. No, I gotta give him the handy. Oh, oh yeah, that's right. He's the one that I gotta go down on him if the,
like if in the right just world,
why is he doing anything to me after what he,
what the sweat and blood that he poured out here
on the, on the general store floor floor?
Make sure that he doesn't eat too much candy
or drink too much soda.
And I'm gonna have to really watch him,
like a real son.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, I told him I tried to take a cigarette away
from him, he wouldn't have it though.
Oh, no. Yeah. Do you think that if we did another Vegas trip?
Jimmy the hair guy would come with this? Yeah. I think he's listening to this when he packed his bag. He's nothing important right?
He just yeah, he just ruined his candies. All right, because get him doesn't want to go. So maybe Jimmy the hair guy will go and
Hey, I'm gonna go to Vegas. I don't have to farm to worry about anymore. That was my big thing with the time. Oh, I see. Okay. Yeah, we'll see. We'll see.
Okay, just just remember Jimmy heavy is the crown. What crown the crown that you're putting on his head?
I ain't gonna be heavy. Oh, it is. No, it isn't. Yeah. Oh, go ahead. What does that mean?
Obviously there's some bitterness and so on. No, it's just heavy. It's the crown, it's a saying.
You were wearing a crown up at this point.
No, heavy crown.
Heavy crown?
Being in Walt's favor is not as easy as a crown.
Yeah.
Ah.
All right.
Yeah, likes I expect a certain level of competence.
This is how Hitler ran his staff too.
Oh, yeah.
Spit them against each other.
Yeah, keep them on their toes.
Well, it looks like Hitler and he's like sloppy work, bro.
Should be getting text at 3 a.m.
I'm just gonna just flex you questions.
Wow, geez.
I need you to come up with a game by 4 a.m.
In what I hope doesn't happen again.
My mother
listened to the last episode of Tellum Steve Dave.
Oh, that's never good.
New.
No, we talk about it.
No, it wasn't a bad one.
It was mostly his shit blowing up the up.
Oh, right.
It's not like that, but she said it was funny.
Oh yeah.
She was just something happened on Amazon
and it started playing so she just listened to it.
As I go, I don't do that.
I'm like, it's plenty of episodes you don't want.
Yeah, I know.
I just don't do that.
I have a similar story we were at Thanksgiving
with my 100 year old aunt, my other aunt's family.
And my one aunt comes over and she's like, okay.
I'm in front of my cousin, Jenny.
And she's like, explaining me what a podcast is. And I go into explaining and she's like, she's like Jenny, do you listen to you?
She's like, oh yeah, listen all the time.
I'm like, oh no.
Oh no.
This is just yeah, after we had to talk about my auntie.
So she listens to this show?
Yeah, she said she did.
I don't think she does.
Yeah, I think she was just saying it.
All right.
Because she's like, people listen to the show, Jenny's like, oh she, I was just saying it. All right. Because she's like,
people listen to the show,
and she's like,
oh yeah, yeah, I listen to it.
It's a great show.
Because you don't want your aunt to hear,
to me, the hair guy,
the riser of all of you.
That was a setter.
I don't think they worry about that.
Would they feel bad for you
if they knew that dropping that you take
on kind of a regular basis?
Well, they've seen it.
Like I, I proudly showed like the, the Black Friday
commercial, you know, that's not taking the
drumming, but me will me, you know, you're dressed up as a turkey, that kind of
stuff. I don't mind showing, showing that around.
Yeah, it's not, well, that's fun stuff.
Yeah, that's not, that's not calling you out for your,
for your shortcomings.
I think they're well, well, well aware of my shortcomings.
Be having been around me for 45 years.
But it did issue my cousin got two little kittens.
She adopted two Tuxedo brothers.
Oh, cool.
Yeah.
And while we were sitting there, one just came up to me, he was playing around my feet
and then just collapsed on my foot.
Oh, collapsed on foot. And then slowly worked his way into my lap and just passed out
Great moment. Oh, I haven't had a kitten in my lap in like
Years and yeah, it's just I'm with you, bro. I can't wait to isolate that
It was great. Boris is getting his balls cut off today.
Oh, I was wondering if he'd become a little too
rembunctious.
You haven't spoken about him lately.
Well, I haven't really been home.
I was, you know, I was, I was traveling
about in LA and I was in Florida and then I was sick for a week.
But yeah, no, he's doing great.
Today's days, balls get cold.
I'm surprised there's not some sort of natural remedy
that they can do nowadays instead of lopping them off like you can chemically castry like you have this
Snippin yeah, there's still a chance that they can get cancerous
Like the uterus the same with the the females. Yeah, yeah, and this guy's got big balls, too. They got to go
They got to be I got to be the biggest balls in the house. I think this cat's got big balls too, they gotta go. They gotta be the biggest balls in the house.
I think this cat's looking at it.
Like, you're going down.
Yeah, yeah.
No, it's great cat, great cat.
Perfectly, I got the same problem with the dog, the balls.
Yeah, gotta get rid of him.
Yeah.
How old is that dog now?
He's like nine months.
Yeah, you gotta get those balls off, bro.
I gotta get them off right away. Get them off before he starts coming all over things.
Oh, is that what he's gonna do? I think so. Yeah. I can't have the...
Showing you who's boss. Yeah, like on my face when I'm sleeping.
Oh shit, he's like... What are you gonna do with that?
Yeah, wash it off. Yes. Same as last night. We're all over going back to sleep.
Sorry, Mr. Norm.
Sorry.
There was also a cue door to blind item, is right?
A blind item?
You're right.
What is a blind item?
Blind item is when they put something on, like, say, page six in the New York Post.
Okay.
And it's like, what two funny men on True TV were caught, you know, doing blah blah blah, hanging out,
you know, corows and what is it called the blind night? Because you don't say who it is.
Oh, I see. Okay. So I have a blind item from Black Friday, if you're interested. Oh, yeah,
of course. So it's what two former podcast co-hosts are in odds over rumored comments about one of them shitting on the con floor.
This was in the New York Post. Yeah.
You know red paint sticks, the cosmonies.
Wow, we were told with good authority, the two former co-hosts aren't on speaking terms in me. One was even blocked if I'm not mistaken.
I didn't hear any of this.
Yeah, this was all there.
Oh, you weren't there?
I wasn't there.
Oh, so it'll be me.
Appreciate this blind item.
Packin' boxes.
I'll make it stuff up in my head.
Wow, is that true?
That's what I hear.
Yeah, I don't think they've come back together yet,
as far as I know.
Who told you this? One of the parties. Oh, I don't think they've come back together yet as far as I know who told you this
One of the parties. Oh, so it's first sort. It's not blind at all
It's blind to the people out there who don't know. Well, I mean is it a surprise? Are you surprised like
You can only say somebody shit on the con floor so many times before they take a personal Well, I think you know, who aren't involved in the show sometimes take a
dropping on this show. And I wonder like, how does that like that's not going to
manifest into positive feelings. But,
Q, if I, if were you out there in New York, Comic Con this year, did you know I do not
show? Okay, let's say last year, or whatever year you were there. Yeah. And that incident happened where someone took a dump on
the on the con floor. Yeah. And I went online and tweeted I was like, oh shit, BQ is our
Bet you that's BQ's. Did that. Would you be mad at me? No. Would you would you run with it or would
you? Yeah, I might. It's like, like, like, probably run with it. Yeah, that's, yeah.
Run with it, depending on your mood, be like,
ah, yeah, I'm showing the fur.
Yeah, but is that come at the end of a long string
of unanswered punches in my direction?
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
No, but like, to me, it's like he is not sleeping with the enemy per se, but like he's you know
It there's been no show of solidarity and a boycotting
You know so
Should apologize. Oh
Some of one is a guy who said that should apologize. Well if he gives a shit if he doesn't
He ever will oh well then no I don't think he ever will.
Oh, well, then no.
I don't, I just don't see him like ever
like doing the right thing and being like,
Hey, you know what?
I've said you, I'm sorry.
It was a joke.
Can we put this piece behind us?
Right.
You know, totally, totally didn't realize
it was going to upset you this way.
And I didn't mean it for it to happen at way.
Truly sorry. Maybe, you know, you should just play that. You should just play that. Totally didn't realize it was gonna upset you this way and I didn't mean it for it to happen at way truly sorry
Play that you should just play that
You know it'll happen in a couple years. They'll look at each other from across a field
Sharon knowing glance and everything will be solved. Yeah, all right
I mean
Doesn't care then I you know, I guess that speaks volumes on its own.
Silence is sometimes louder than words.
It's golden.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But again, I, you know, I don't think you could blame the offended
party for getting offended, I think.
No, there's no blame. no blame yeah like I understand why
Yeah, if I was taking it non-stop unanswered and my friend
Spreading these scurllous rumors
spreading these scurrilous rumors. Scurrilous.
Yeah.
But does anyone believe them, though?
Nobody believes that the party should have shit on the floor.
I think it's kind of like the famous pan house case.
But it's just the way what pan house case?
The one where Jerry Falwell, they ran an ad where Jerry Falwell
talks about having sex with his mother in the pan house.
Oh, what's parody?
Yeah, what's parody in what's libeless?
Sure. I 100% but like I'm just saying like it's not that's just the check, the straw. That's not the load that broke the camel's back.
Okay.
It's just the final little piece of weight that just threw it over.
And honestly, the repercussions aren't even that bad.
Certainly not going to be felt in this room at all.
So, you know, it's not a big deal, but I understand.
I understand where it's coming from.
You know, it's like death wish, man.
You can only put your shit off her right now.
I'm a pound man.
Office coach.
I never heard you there, guys.
Not once.
Never.
What are the alerts even for?
Email.
Oh my God.
Every time you get an email, that thing goes off.
Certain emails.
Yeah.
Promos at fucking Wawa.
Right.
Now it's probably like my USPS informed delivery.
Okay.
So I know there's mail sitting at the farm.
Speaking of USPS, we had some mail to deliver the other day.
I mean, get them and we drove over to the post office.
And it literally takes him at this point now.
I'm not lying.
I don't know what you're laughing about.
It takes him about 10 minutes to get out of the car and into the post office now.
It's that got in that bed.
His body is falling apart at a rapid pace.
Dude. Dude, what is he apart. That's a rapid pace.
Dude.
What is he smiling about?
I'm not lying.
It's my foot hurts.
All the time.
Yeah, you don't do anything about it.
Yeah, I said no.
What do you do?
You stick a needle in it and drain it.
No, I'm it soaking it.
I'm it soaking, I've been trying to rest it.
So in my opinion, this has to be a wake up call.
So we're in the post office.
And this elderly man opens the door for us
and says happy holidays.
And I said happy Thanksgiving.
And he whips around his head super fast and he goes,
I'm 93 years old.
What do you think of that?
And I was like, wow, I go, you're 93.
You look fantastic.
I said, like, what's the secret?
And he said the secret was drinking and raisin hell.
And get him was like, I got one of those covered.
He said, you know, a smart ass.
You know, I was always, you know.
And then we watched, you proceeded to watch this old man walk
to his car as if it was like, as if he was in his 20s.
Ross Sprite.
With a step, a pep in his step with...
Like he's just hung out with Jimmy the hair guy.
Yeah, yeah, he's spending the afternoon with Jimmy the hair guy.
He's smelling his head.
And I said, I turn around and I said, man, if this is the wake up call, I go,
I predict in 10 years, if he doesn't change the road he's on,
he will not even be able to walk.
He, at that, at this point, it's getting that bad.
You can be one of those guys with like the,
the ankles that swell over the socks and the shoes
and everything.
You've seen those guys, man.
Yeah.
And yeah, you're on the road to that.
I'll go down with water, all water.
When you, you just shake your head like, no, that's not the case.
How can you deny it at this point?
What?
Your body's falling apart at a rapid decline.
I'm not stopping the point.
A rapid decline.
Everything has a lump on it.
Except the wrist.
What was it should be?
Right?
I mean, it's just a tear eating and you won't stop
or start to do the things you should be doing though.
Last night you're eating peppers, you shouldn't be eating.
Well, not that I mean peppers. I mean, peppers that were a little too hot for me to eat.
So peppers, you shouldn't have eaten.
Now I...
Now you're like, I'm paying for it, I can't move.
I didn't say that. It's just my stomach problem.
Asked you be the hair guy to do it.
Whatever it is.
Ah, fuck it, damn it.
No, my father makes hot peppers for like the holidays and for my aunt, my 100 year old
aunt, and he just makes them hotter and hotter and hotter.
It's, you know, just got to get a rise out of her and they sent them home with me instead
of it.
Yeah, a little loving relationship that is.
No, that's a passive aggressive shit.
No, she likes it.
She likes it hot.
Yeah. Yeah. She can handle it. Yeah, anti-likes it hot and hot in a passive aggressive shit. No, she likes it hot. Yeah.
She can handle it.
Yeah, anti-likes it hot, and I'll have to do your soldier.
But at a certain point though, you like, you know,
we've tried.
We've put the carrot on the stick.
Five years ago, I was wondering.
We'll give you $1,000 if you lose this.
We lose $5,000 if you lost 100 pounds.
Yeah.
You have tried and tried and tried.
At this point, if I'm like, you, I've given up, you really can't tried and tried it at this point if I'm like you I've given up
You really can't hold it against you, right? I can't I can no longer like try to coerce or try to somehow figure a way to motivate
It's it's over tough love tough love. I mean, it's no love no love. Oh, it's gone
Towards Jimmy and Haragoye now. Oh, he's my number one
It's gone. It's all gone towards Jimmy and a hair guy now.
He's my number one.
Jimmy needs the support now with his new, uh, that's the question I will.
He changed his ways.
I think you're absolutely.
It's not going to be my guidance.
I think the man is smart.
He hasn't had a 148 IQ, but he's smart enough to know he wants to live.
And what he's doing isn't contributing to that.
Yeah.
And there's some people in the room that think they're so smart that they can even fucking
outsmart death.
Wow.
That's pretty much more than what the way you dance with that, man.
So Jimmy in the hair guy is like, he's like a cliff claiming.
He's like a male delivery person.
He works for the male
He works in the male industry, but he is not a carrier. Okay, and I wouldn't say he has the the disposition of
Of a cliff cleave and have all the facts. He's he's more of like a woody. Oh
Okay, like right. I push he tell doby. Yeah, like just
He's held dopey. Yeah, like just eager to please.
He's gonna take off the car.
And innocent.
And innocent who goes to Juggalo,
events and eats dirty ass.
You can call Ben Arby's.
He covered my head to tell tattoos.
He's just an innocent baby to what?
That's Jimmy's LinkedIn profile.
I didn't know I'd be.
It's way better.
I didn't know I'd be.
Oh man.
Yeah, I don't know Walt. I mean, I don't think you're gonna be able to stop because at the end of the day
He's our friend and it's hard to watch your friend. It's been years
I know I know and you see you gotta take over now. I'm gonna pass in the baton you my only solution anything is to throw money at it
It didn't work
Find a different angle and if you care
Yeah, how much you how much does Q care do you have
An extra room showing
Yeah, take him in just for a one year. Yeah boot camp. Yeah, I haven't lived with you
Train with you. Yeah
I'm taking the work with you as your assistant. Well, I won't do any of that, but I mean, you know, I got my guy Steve that I work with, like,
sporadically. Great guy. That'll great trainer. I would, I would pay, forget him to work with him.
Even he could even do a digitally over zoom. So he could just do it right here.
And a couple of times we week just just get together.
He won't do it though. He won't do it. You need to be on his balls. I can drill sergeant.
I can't be on it. I don't want kids. It's the reason I never had kids. I don't want to I don't want
to ride anybody's fucking balls about anything. Like, but this is for good cause. Oh, this is to keep
him around. Yeah, but like he could take the what I'm offering. He could. It's on him. He could
take what I'm offering. He could, but he on him. He could take what I'm offering.
He could, but he hasn't in the past,
and I don't see any reason to believe he will in the future.
Well, what do you say, again,
and you think you want to try working
with Transmacia fitness, my boy, Steve?
Well, like what would be my goal?
Well, to get healthy to get this way, get limber, you know?
Get on it on a good diet
Don't stop drinking every night into a super
Is that look on his face every time he fucking does one of your
It's that far way look on his face and you know that he's not doing it. Yeah, which is why he's not gonna Vegas
Which is why I was like, you know, I gotta wash my hands at certain point
I've tried put all the time in that I can
And I just he's just got to live his life the way he sees fit. I can't see if I can't and I can't feel any guilt
What if I brought Steve in here one day and
We tried to have like an intervention. He could ask him about his habits ask him about his health habits and assess the situation
Maybe you could even give him hints is he a psychologist? No, he's a he's personal trainer
Maybe you could even give him hints. Is he a psychologist?
No, he's a, he's a personal trainer.
Hmm, I don't know.
You really think I think we need,
we need somebody who has a psychological background, I think.
Somebody who can trick him into it,
like put some kind of spell on him.
Yeah, I don't have anybody in the world.
So I don't have, I mean, usually that is for me,
has always been like a hot woman.
Right.
He's not even motivated
Yeah, that is not motivated. He just says he's married and won't do anything
Yeah, so I
I don't want to say you wash me hands. I think you got to just let live and let live man
He's got to let him go and put down the path he's on. Where's this all gonna end up? Let's look it
Let's let's forecast the future. We're in the top. We are we've been written
We say the podcast is never gonna
But let's just say just for the sake of this conversation
Five years and ends in five years from now, right in terms of what just
We're not recording anymore. We're kind of like he's moving down the air moving to the villages
Whatever like whatever for whatever reason five years. What happens to get him?
Like if we were to shut down today if Tal Tom Steve Dave today was like folks since I last
episode it's been a great ride. Thank you so much. We out.
I think he'd find some sort of security job, but I don't know if he would be hired in the physical condition he's in right now.
He thinks he's still spraw, he thinks he's still capable of doing normal every day.
I can't get him. Yeah.
He's not though. I watch him, I watch him and it's just, it's pathetic.
Yet we're walking, we had to walk down to the landlord
the other day and he's yelling and complaining at me
that I'm walking too fast and I'm just walking
my normal walk.
True.
I love that both of you have to go.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm the good world.
I don't know, I'm the good well. People like me. She likes him for some reason.
I was going to ask her a question. She said no to him, and I wanted him there as well for
worlds. It may be harder to say no if I was there.
But I guess like a thing, like, are the show ends like are you still talking to him every day?
You know, I, if it, if I'm not keeping up with it,
no, I think he would just latch on to some other person
at his new job, or his new existence,
and they would become his sounding board.
Wow, what do you think?
Get him in five years?
Well, again, get him today.
Get him today? Yeah, I agree with Walt.
I think some sort of job in the security industry
since he has that going for him.
But once they took a look at him and they're like,
it can't take you 10 minutes to get out of the golf cart.
I expect a potential disability.
Oh, on the toll.
Yeah.
Well, he's happy.
He's kind of a little smile about that.
Yeah.
The doll.
I always dreamed about being on the doll.
Yeah.
That's the dream that the doll dreamed.
You know what I said?
The doll dream.
Had it for years.
Someone say he's on the doll now.
Oh, fuck yeah.
I mean, if you guys really saw the amount of TV he doesn't get paid for it
That he watches yeah you guys are like he's on the doll
Get him with your first move we wrapped up but then what's the first move?
Don't wonder if I qualify for unemployment. Sure.
Oh, okay.
I'm not a point of success.
Are you paying any of the taxes?
Any of the money we give you?
Yeah.
Okay.
They won't catch my checks for some reason the IRS, but I send it to them.
Okay.
So, um, so yeah, all right.
So that's six months.
But I still have my Sora.
So yeah, I'd probably go for an insurance.
I mean, uh, security job.
Who do you stay in touch with from the show?
Are you trying to stay in touch with Waltz?
I will try to stay in touch with everyone
as much as they try to stay in touch with me.
I'll say to you a little cap, yeah?
No, because some people don't respond to my text right away.
Right.
Oh, okay.
I'm joined the club.
I'm joined the club.
Yeah.
I'm like, I know this motherfucker saw this.
It's red.
The way he looks at his phone when he's recording TSD.
That guy looks at a phone constantly.
He's got that same look kid of have over.
He never talked about bringing Steve into the room.
He's scheduling questions and I'm like, all right, I got to figure this out. No, definitely, yeah, try to get another scary joke.
Look, it's like a Sunday.
My brother texted me on Tuesday.
What's the day?
There is a answer to them today.
All right.
So what's the power everybody gets to see?
Yeah, it's like, what is the issue here?
I do notice.
We got to, I notice it.
If it's not, tell them Steve Dave related definitely answers answers faster like if we're just like shooting the shit about
Yeah, so I'll buy your schedule. It's a cuz yeah cuz you know, it's then you got to look into it
And then it's like you know, it takes a little bit more to it
But like we've been in age wherever he's got to talk to each other immediately
Like you're already all days
I just came from a village man
Well, they fucking remember how things were. What they remember how awesome it was. Well, you weren't connected to everybody by the
symbolical court at all times. Everybody making demands on you.
New cue. Yeah. Somehow was born long before he went down to the village and discovered this.
But I feel well tonight would continue to carry on because he would have like technical questions.
He would be. I don't know if I would, because I'm no longer podcasting.
I don't need any real help with issues I may have,
because now I'm retired.
How do I stop my cable box for talking to me?
Please.
Uh, maybe, maybe, but there's no guarantees.
We may drift apart and never talk to each other ever again
if this podcast were to end.
It's possible it could happen. I mean, there's people that I don't, I would never fall away from
and not talk to. And history and reality is, it happens.
Top five. Top five. Top five.
I think we would run any rather than flea market.
There is, we've never run into each other
anywhere but here.
Not anywhere but here.
I used to see you at the flea market
but I was too scared to approach you.
Holy shit, really?
I told you this.
I told you this.
No, I've never heard this.
I saw a doorbell.
Oh, that's a doorbell.
So first time I spent, I saw his wife.
He's at the, wow. This is adorable that adorable that you were star struck. Yeah, what happened?
What do you mean? You're not so star truck now that you tell me no constantly when I ask you to do something here an employee?
It doesn't say no
What happened to all that's what happened to that bushy tailed you know
I was avoiding you then I'm still avoiding you now
Yeah, it was I was in the army. Maybe story you walk by them like oh
I didn't have the balls come over and say hello. You're walking and then I could I can
I talked behind I talked behind the counter
Yeah, but you know that's something know, if you care about something,
there's a point if like, if you become an invalid,
yeah, we will not see each other very often.
Maybe at first when you're bedridden
and I may come over and be like,
as I feel sorry for you,
but we'll slowly though those visits
will become less and less frequent
to eventually just become texts,
to like holiday text, to no text.
Oh, well, I think if I get on the doll,
I'll get one of those electric scooters
and I can just, you know, put around the,
you won't, that scooter will not take you here.
It won't take you to my house.
You know, you'll become,
there's an elevator here.
You'll become a shut-in.
There's an elevator here, right?
There's all this so much easier
than just fucking using weight.
I can't get a scooter.
Your ankle won't make it through the elevator doors. I don't get a scooter.
Your ankle won't make it through the elevator doors.
I don't care.
He's got an LED sign on it.
Is there an ad to read or something?
And then one day, like even further down the line,
like somebody sends out like a tweet or whatever,
a social media time and like it's
getting so bitch-wearing.
It's like guys, did you know that?
Yeah, but holy shit, yeah.
I didn't know.
I had no idea.
We're gonna go right.
We got the last time we talked to him.
Yeah, when's the last time we talked to him?
Fuck, I don't even know.
That's since the last day we stopped recording.
He texted me a few times, but I never answered.
I mean, do we go to a way?
We gotta go to a wait, right?
Oh, definitely.
Do we do like a special episode of Tom's YouTube?
He'd understand it if I wore track pants, right?
I wouldn't.
I wouldn't.
Oh, it's tonight.
Ah, cute. Get him died.
His wake is tomorrow. Can you make it?
They made a late way for me.
I'm sorry, guys. I was...
You phone who they had to go perform on stage with Brett Michael.
Yeah. You tell me what you'd rather do. Yeah, sorry guys, I was new phone who they had to go perform on stage with Brett Michael
You tell me what you'd rather
WWE event. I don't even do what you would do in my situation
What a sad wake
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Nice.
And a quick thank you to everybody who signed up to Mary Beth Oli fans.
It was a turnout that I did not expect.
Really?
A lot of people. Yeah, they're having a good time over there.
Oh, good, man.
Body. A body time.
So if you want to sign up, go to at Mary Beth Rosie, M-A-R-I-B-E-T-H-R-O-S-I-E and join the
fun.
Nice.
And then I want you to mention the cruise.
We still have like a few cabins left.
So Christmas holidays coming up.
You know, what's the date of that cruise?
January 22nd.
January 22nd on Miami.
Departs.
Departs out of Miami comes back, leaves out Monday, comes back that Friday.
Ming Channel B on the boat.
Oh, I hear Troy is going to be on the boat.
Troy is going to be on the boat.
Wish Jimmy the hair guy was coming now.
Well, that could be one of the 40 things
if you can give Tim a cabin.
All right, let's see if Jimmy the hair guy can make it.
Oh my God, he would be.
He could make it.
I think if you had a cabin form, would be there because then it's you know
The more tell them see if Dave town residents would pile on it the more becomes like, you know, yeah, like a tells
I was I mean in essence, you know, he he earned it, you know your business he was helping out. Yeah, you're right
Yeah, you're right all right
If anybody earned a cruise I was
Realistic is this not because right now he's probably swallowing his tongue.
Well, the cabin I can get him.
If the airfare, if he wants to.
Okay.
Yeah.
Well, Jimmy, get in touch with me.
I'll put you in touch with cues peeps.
Yeah.
Oh my God.
I mean, just heard it.
So there was people speculating though
that Jimmy was stupid.
Stupid for for
$2,000 for my hair.
Well, and also do it like somehow, you know, coming in and like taking on this
task that nobody asked him to do.
And I've heard some, uh, some things I didn't like to overheard some things.
I didn't like some things that made me a little slightly annoyed that he wasn't that he was a dope and an idiot for doing it
What sort of where? Oh, there's I think I know who you're talking about and
Now he's possibly going on a cruise. Yeah, would be cute. So who's the fucking idiot now?
Having me would be cute
Stupid yeah, you're right. You're dead right.
Yeah. Right. This is what this is what happens when you're touched by TSD.
Fuck angels. You rather be touched by TSD.
Angels don't get shit done.
Tasty.
Yes, shit done. You can get a cruise. You don't know. You don't know. One day
you're not on a cruise the next day you're on a cruise.
Yeah. All right. Let me say Tom. See you there. No, no, no, no,. You're looking at me. But I think, no, I think it's funny what you're saying. I was,
it did, I did have a question here because I watch all these murder porn shows and like one of
them is like people that go, they disappear, you know, suddenly a member of your family is just
gone. And one of my questions was, and now that I, that, uh, get him has sunk so low in terms of like, you feel you're, you're,
you're feeling that you can, you could help him that, uh, I don't even know if he
would look at all because I was like, if he didn't want missing,
oh, how long would you look for him? Now, I'm talking about the kind of
missing where like you show up, the office is open. His keys and his cell
phones, his fucking 10 cell phones, I never tell you what when he did went missing what I did no you went missing did I not tell you
No, I think I think it's been wrote up before I think I may have told it on another podcast would be cute and Brian
Weren on oh, okay, well what happened so back when we had the general store in red bank. Yeah at the at the new stash
One morning I showed up and he wasn't there. And it hours went by and you know we departed the night before
and he was like I'll see you tomorrow and I'll see you tomorrow.
And he just wasn't there and so I got worried and worried and more worried.
And so I drove over to where he's the celery lives in.
And I was looking at the round level windows,
trying to see if I could see his carcass.
Pass the cobwebs and still go on the ground
or something like me.
Because I figured like if he passed out
or he's unconscious, no one's even gonna know.
So I'm trying to get a peek in in those.
And I'm looking around and I call Jeff.
And I was like, look, I'm really worried.
What should I do?
Should I knock on a door and have,
because I don't think there's no cars here.
Yeah.
Should I walk into this lady's house in Seafees on the ground?
And Jeff was like,
because you know she doesn't lock the doors.
I knew, yeah, I know she doesn't lock the doors.
And I know I could walk in and go down
to the basement of Seafees down there.
And I want to ask somebody if I should do this or not,
because it could go real south real bad.
Yeah.
Let's say she wasn't there and she shot me or something.
Sure.
So Jeff goes, what are you going to, what if he is on the floor?
He goes, what are you going to do?
What can you do though?
You know, it's probably too late.
So I wouldn't go up in there.
I would just call an ambulance or call the cops to a welfare check.
Yeah.
And I was like, yeah, that's probably the smarter move I said, I don't know. I feel like I'm overreacting. I go, I feel like I'm like, and I was like, yeah, that's probably the smarter move I said.
I go, I don't know, I feel like I'm overreacting.
I go, I feel like I'm like, and I'm like,
I'm in a tizzy because I'm really worried.
And I'm driving around, I drive into all the places
where I think he might be.
Wow.
And library.
Yeah, I went to, because he would go to the library
in the parking lot and just to latch onto the free Wi-Fi.
Yeah, it's so funny, because when he said library,
my first thought was like,
well, that's cool, get him's reading.
He's reading.
I was, I just phone.
We're really ready, yeah.
I should've known.
So I'm going all over the place.
I'm spending hours of my day looking for him in his haunts.
And I go back to the parking lot, I park my car,
I'm all fucking worried.
And he pulls in with this big dopey grin on his face.
And I was like, and I'm like, I just start to rate him,
where the fuck were you?
Like, why didn't you tell me you weren't gonna be here?
You told me you were gonna be here today
and you weren't here.
And where were you, I can't remember.
I, well, I, they were having a big race over
at the race track.
And so I brought my scanner over
and it's got something called close call technology
where it'll pick up close signals.
And I figured they're having a big event
so they must have all their radios going.
So I just sat in one of the parking lots
and scanned for about 45 minutes to an hour
and copied down the frequencies.
So I could have them then program into my scanner.
Again, why?
So I could listen in.
Why?
Because I was still, I'd like to know what's going on.
I'd like to know what the same reason I listen to, you know,
the EMT scanner and all the other stuff.
So I could hear what's going on over with the racetrack.
So it's a drive around.
To answer your question, though, like, yeah, all kidding aside,
yeah, I probably would start a immediate search party.
Mm-hmm.
There's, and the racetrack had a, the racetrack had a similar story.
I'd rally the wrongs.
I rally anybody in our proposal that I can get a posse up.
Don't you always think though, like once you go past his usual haunts, you're like,
what do I do now?
Like, why did he leave this shit behind?
Like, where could he put, like, he's not the kind of guy that they're going to take for sex trafficking.
Right?
Why not?
Well, I mean there are probably some bears out there
that would probably be into him.
Could be, but it's just like such a chore to drag him away
to like get him in the van and all that shit.
I mean, can you imagine?
They could lure me.
They lure me in as a new frequency on.
Yeah.
On your radio.
Is that Ocean Port police?
Is that it?
Yeah.
But it was so funny because Jeff was, Jeff would drag my balls about it all the time. He'd be like,
Oh my son's dead.
Son's dead.
You're like, you're a fucking bothering me at work.
I'm working and your fucking call me three or four times in an hour going,
get him still not, I can't find him.
He said this while getting him was still missing.
Yeah.
He's right. Like, he was not worried whatsoever.
I was in a tizzy.
Yeah, one time when I was still working at the track,
I was just starting to work at the 35 Broad Street.
And we had some event and I was down at the short house
with a bunch of ants.
And I got really, really, really drunk.
And my phone died.
By the time I woke up, it was like, I'm supposed to be at work at died. By the time I woke up, it was like,
I'm supposed to be at work at five.
By the time I woke up, it was like 11.
So I just made it to the store on time.
I'd plug my phone in and charge it
and I get text messages from my neighbor,
like the cops are at your house.
Oh.
And so I get back to the farm and there's a card
from a cop in the back says says this is not a courtesy card. And when I flip it over it says call ASAP.
So my job since even though they hate me, they're like he's not here and he's never wanting to not show up.
So they call the cops out to my house to investigate and do a well.
Yeah, he's not wanting to break his routine. So when a routine is broken, it's alarming.
And again, it's like it goes back to your health though.
If I told you tomorrow that like he, he succumbed to the fucking one of his many
growths. Yeah.
Last night.
Yeah.
Would you be shocked at this point?
He's of an age where it can happen now at any time now.
If he doesn't start changing his routines, it has.
It has happened.
I've no people who have died and been healthier than him.
I feel like holy fuck, they just had a defect of heart.
And you know, your neighbor.
Yeah.
Yeah, that would be fucked up.
Or at least got us.
I don't know.
And you can't force him to do it though.
You can't, you can't go with him, you can't shame him, you can't,
he's just gotta do it on his own.
It's just like, mm.
Well, he's also not in an age where he can just shake it off either.
It's like it takes, it would take real work now
to get back to where you need to be in order to be healthy.
And that includes like the eating part of it.
You can't go to the Chinese buffet and eat fucking,
we wouldn't earn your place there anymore.
If you're eating right, you would not,
you wouldn't buy your own rolls, you wouldn't be allowed there.
I could think I could still, you know,
even when I was at my thinnest,
I could still pack away a 50 B.
Yeah, you were fucking 20 years old.
It's days of God.
I'm not doubting your ability to eat it.
No one's doubting that.
Yeah.
But that's what's all about.
Is the eating it?
Yeah.
All right.
He we were getting up there.
Yeah.
Get him.
Yeah, man.
All of a certain age.
Get him.
You're not a spring chicken.
Anyway, and I a little boy.
No, just a matter of blue tube, bro.
Real quickly.
Is it right to use our influence to sway in election?
That's the question here
What level election? Let's say a friend of ours his wife is a very accomplished baker. Oh, and she's in a baking contest
You want to stack the deck a little bit?
An online it's an online thing
So so so so how has that really gaging someone's ability to cook
because someone's even tasting the-
I don't know.
It's the weirdest.
I'm not exactly sure.
I think it's just like visually, like how it looks
because Troy's wife, Merrill, is a baker.
You know what?
And she does amazing.
I'm not just saying this.
I'm not just saying this.
The shit she makes, I'm like, why are you not like,
I guess she is a pro?
But why are you just making out of your kitchen? Why don't you have like a buddy style?
I would be all for it if we can sway an election. Yeah, a level of, you know, a bakery level election then if we can
We can sway that one who knows what, you know, what else can we sway them? Okay. I like it. I love it. I originally my first thought was like,
I don't really want to do it because I feel bad
for the other people in the contest,
but if it's narrow, I'm in.
Right, it's narrow.
It's based on visuals.
Yeah.
So all you have to do is go to tell them Steve Dave
on X, which used to be Twitter,
and I will have pinned the link up there
so you can set simply, you can just go there nice and do that and she probably wouldn't want anyway.
She's probably gonna win.
I've seen some stuff.
Yeah, pretty great.
It's a pretty amazing shit.
Which delicious.
So I think that I mean I got a whole bunch more for this week but we are in a time crunch
aren't we Walt?
Yeah, we got stuff to do.
We got shit to do.
So sorry for the abbreviated a bridged episode this week but hey it's better than nothing.
Tell him Steve Dave.
to do. We got shit to do. So sorry for the abbreviated a bridged episode this week, but
hey, it's better than nothing.
Tell him Steve Dave.